I clear my throat. “How you doing?”
She nods and swipes the bottles of wine under the scanner. “Good.” Her eyes flick back to me, gazing at the full beard I have now. I can’t remember the last time I shaved, probably when she lived at home.
“You having a party?” She scans another bottle of red.
“Just going to Lilly’s place for dinner tomorrow.”
She drops her head, sliding the large bag of kibble over the scanner.
“Her and Shane invited me.”
Vi’s eyes look back up at me through her thick lashes.
“You’re more than welcome. There’ll be plenty to go around.”
She shakes her head. “I’m having dinner with my family.”
“You’re going back to your foster parent’s place?” It makes sense that she would go back there. I’m glad she still has them even if they were shit parents.
“No. I’m staying with my uncle and cousins. Myfamily.” She emphasises the word family, making sure I understand who she’s referring to this time.
Usually I get off on her brattiness, but now I just have a sour taste in my mouth. I nod with a tight jaw while placing the crate and wine in my trolley, along with the dog food and other bits.
She rings up the till. “£74.21 please.”
I open my wallet, count out £80.00 and hand it to her. She opens the till and gives me my change. I shove it in my pocket, then grab another wad of notes. “Here, take this.”
She looks at the five twenty-pound notes in my hand. “What for?”
“For Christmas. I never got around to buying you anything, so…”
“Save it. I don’t need your money.”
“Vi, please. I know I don’t deserve you, but for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.” I hold the notes in my hand out as a peace offering. “Look, I know this money is a sorry excuse for a gift. But take it. Even if you use it for fuel to visit your old friends or foster family during the holidays.”
She stares at me with glassy eyes. The fluorescent lighting in the store, highlights the pearls of moisture gathering in the corner of her lashes.
“Hurry up, mate. We haven’t got all day.”
I spin my head to glare at the guy behind me. He holds his hands up and takes a step back.
“Just go, Kane. Take your apology and money with you.” She turns away from me and starts scanning the guy’s items.
I drop the notes on the belt in front of her and push the trolley to the exit with heavy limbs. This is probably what I need to get over her.
Although, it’s been eighteen years, and I’m still not over her mother. I was just beginning to move on now I have a new purpose and reason to live.
Now I have Vi to add to my torment. Another eighteen years of torture, wanting something I can’t have.
If she’s happy, it will bring some comfort, at least. And she’s still close enough that people who care about her can keep an eye on her.
I load my car then jump in, grabbing one of the cans now and guzzling half of it in one go. May as well get an early start.
Merry Fucking Christmas.
35
VIOLET
