“Isn’t he too young to be separated from his mother?”
“He’s a few months old, so he’ll be fine,” Lily said. “At least, I think he’s a boy.”
Matthew couldn’t help but ask, “Why did you bring me a kitten?”
Lily shrugged and thought a moment. “Because you’re unhappy. You’ve endured so much, that I thought you needed something to lift your spirits.” She lifted her gaze to his. “He might help you to live in the present instead of dwelling in the past. And besides, I can’t think of anyone who doesn’t like kittens.”
Lily picked up the kitten and brought it over to a basin. She poured water inside it and gently washed the strawberry filling from the kitten’s fur. The animal squirmed while she cleaned him, letting out a high-pitched squawk. When she was finished, the kitten appeared indignant.
“There, now.” She picked up one of Matthew’s fallen shirts and wrapped it around the animal. “You’ll dry off. It’s not so bad.”
“Thatismy shirt you’ve used as a towel,” he felt compelled to point out.
She dried off the kitten until it resembled a knotted ball of damp fuzz. Then she held him out. “Here, take him.”
Matthew hesitated but finally accepted the animal. It began squeaking, eyeing him as if he were at fault for the bath. Anddespite his earlier mood, he softened. “He seems quite angry with us.”
“He’ll get over it.” Lily picked up the basket and examined the contents. “Oh, look—there’s still one of the tarts wrapped up in a napkin. I don’t think he touched this one.” She pulled out a white linen cloth and unwrapped it, revealing a small pastry with a red filling. “Do you want it?”
The kitten sank its claws into his arm as it climbed up his shirt. Matthew gently lifted it onto his chair, and it crouched into a hunter’s stance before it pounced at a pillow. It struck him that this was as close to an ordinary day that he’d had in some time. The kitten’s antics were a distraction he’d never anticipated, and it wasn’t unwelcome.
Lady Lily took a step closer, holding out the tart. A few strands of brown hair framed her face, and he didn’t miss the shining hope in her hazel eyes.
God above, he shouldn’t have let her in. This had been a big mistake, and he had to make it clear that he could not be her friend. Not with his life in such a tangled mess.
“Lady Lily, I don’t think—”
She lifted her hand and cut him off. “I know you’re going to send me away. But before you do, taste this.” In her hand, she held out the strawberry tart.
She clearly wasn’t going to give him a choice. And why on earth it was so important to her, he didn’t know. But he accepted the pastry and took a bite. The sweet taste of strawberries flooded his mouth, and Matthew blinked as it evoked an unexpected memory.
The last time he’d eaten a strawberry tart, Lily had been with him. He had shared it with her, kissing her hard until the taste mingled with her tongue. He had been desperate to touch her, and the memory of her hands upon his skin struck hard.
The deep sweetness of the berries conjured the taste of her lips, the memory of her head falling back as she arched beneath him. Her hands had clung to his hair as he kissed a path down the softness of her neck, down to her rounded breasts. He had taken a nipple into his mouth, the erect tip rising as she cried out in pleasure.
Matthew set down the strawberry tart, shaken by the vision. He could not deny the arousal of his body as memories flooded through him. He had pleasured her until her body had convulsed against him in ecstasy. He gritted his teeth to force back the unexpected memory.
“Do you like it?” she asked.
He couldn’t answer, still caught up by the daydream. Lily had done this deliberately, wanting him to remember the past. She’d brought him strawberry tarts and a kitten, hoping that he would care for her again.
He forced himself to harden his emotions toward this woman. She didn’t understand how broken his mind was, and he didn’t want to drag her down into his own private hell. After months of torture and pain, he didn’t know how long it would take to recover.
Lily believed that time and friendship would bring him back…but he couldn’t believe that. If he lost himself to a vision again, he might hurt her without meaning to. He was barely holding on to sanity, and he couldn’t take that risk.
And though it was cruel, he needed to cut the bonds between them and free her from the past. This was his battle to face alone.
“Lily, whatever memories we had are in the past. The truth is, I took advantage of your innocence, and we were never legally married. I don’t want or need your help, and you must accept the fact that we cannot be man and wife. It’s best for both of us.”
It felt as if Matthew had struck her in the heart. Though Lily had braced herself for this, it hurt far worse than she’d imagined. She set aside the tart on his breakfast tray, turning her face away to hide the unshed tears.
She should have known that the past could not be fixed so easily. She’d been such a fool to visit, raising her hopes, only to have them dashed into pieces. The urge to leave came over her, so strong she could not deny it.
But a knock at the door interrupted. She had nearly forgotten about Lady Falsham and Matthew’s mother, Lady Arnsbury. The last thing she wanted was to see them right now.
“Your mother and godmother are just outside the door,” she informed him, tucking the napkin back inside the basket.
“I suppose you’ll have to let them in.” He sat down in the wingback chair, and the kitten crawled into his lap.
