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Hal

Of course

What’s up

Grant

I’m outside

This time, there was no answer, but within seconds, Hal opened the door and stepped onto his front porch.

“Come on in,” he called, so Jed took a deep breath and got out of the car.

“Can we talk out here?” he asked, climbing the stairs to join Hal on the porch. He knew it would be chaos inside. Controlled chaos, because Hal’s life could never actually be a mess, but chaos nonetheless.

“Whatever you need.” Hal dropped both hands on Jed’s shoulders and squeezed more gently than usual. “You’ve got me worried now, Jed. What’s going on? You’re not here to tell me you’re announcing your retirement, are you?”

“What?” That brought Jed up short. “No. I’ve got another year on my contract, you know that.”

“I do. But why else would you show up wanting to talk before the last team meeting of the season?” Hal sat down in one of the big, old-fashioned rockers and gestured for Jed to do the same.

Once he was sitting there, staring out at the eco-friendly desert-scape of Hal’s front yard—another reminder, if he needed one, that Hal had it all figured out—Jed had no idea what he wanted to say. Remy’s leaving me sounded so dramatic, even if it might be true. And if it was true, what was Jed going to do about it anyway?

“You know what,” he said finally, “I’m sorry I interrupted your day. Say hi to Allie for me.”

Hal reached over and clamped a hand on Jed’s knee before he could get up.

“Not so fast, my friend. You came here for a reason. Spit it out.”

An unwelcome sullen feeling started welling up in his chest.

“Something to do with Remy, maybe?”

Jed felt himself scowl.

“Is he taking the loss hard?”

Jed felt himself scowling harder.

“You’ve gotta actually tell me, Jed, or I can’t help you.”

“I don’t think you can help me regardless.” Jed focused on whatever anger he was feeling, because it was better than despair. He focused on feeling angry at himself and maybe also at Hal, for making him believe he could have something lasting with Remy. “He’s packing up, Hal. He’s going back to Montreal right after the meeting tomorrow.”

“Ah.” Jed risked a look in Hal’s direction and saw that he was frowning now, too. “What did you talk about doing after the season ended?”

“We didn’t talk about it. He was so worried about his contract. And I didn’t want to put any pressure on him during the playoffs. You said yourself, I was helping to keep his head on straight. I couldn’t risk him getting distracted or upset.”

“Hmm. Well then, what did you say when he told you he’s going back to Montreal?” And then, with narrowed eyes, “You didn’t say anything at all, did you.”

“What the fuck was I supposed to say? I’m not going to keep him from going if he doesn’t want to be here.”

“Jed. If I was being this stupid with Allie, what would you say to me?”

Jed didn’t want to answer that. He knew what the right answer was. Hal was going to tell him he should have talked to Remy about it. Hal had probably never been in this position, though, so far gone for someone who was younger and better and deserved so much more than Jed could offer, someone who had people who loved him but lived thousands of miles away.

He settled on saying, “I don’t want to be selfish. Remy misses being in Montreal. I don’t want to hold him back from going home.”

“Maybe give him the choice, though, Jed. Maybe it’s not as selfish as you think. Did you at least tell him you want him to stay? Or that you want to go with him? Or whatever the hell it is that you actually want?”