Page 9 of And It’s Still You

“If you say so. Guess who called me today?”

“Who?”

“Moya.”

I slowly bobbed my head. “That’s good. I’m not surprised. You know she likes to keep check on you, especially on a day like today.”

“She does, which is why I’ll always love her.”

“Me too, Mama.”

If it was one person I could be vulnerable with and open myself up to, it was my mother. She was the light through my darkest times. I didn’t hide any emotion when it came to her. When Moya and I went through our divorce, I cried on my mama’s shoulder many days. Her home became my safe haven, my healing place. Being around her eased some of the pain, but it never fully disappeared.

Mama patted my thigh. “I know you still miss her.”

“I do, but I’ve learned to live without her. Life hasn’t stopped going, so I didn’t either.”

“Have you met anyone else?”

“Outside of sex? Nah. I’m not interested in another relationship right now.”

“Mmm.”

“What was that for?”

The side-eye Mama gave me with those eyes matching mine caused me to chuckle. Her umber skin held a tint of red as she closed the book and stared at me with her head slightly tilted to the side. Pretty self.

“You know exactly what that was for, O’Shea. I always tell you that I feel it in my spirit, you and Moya will end up back together.”

I huffed. “I doubt it. It’s been five years.”

“And? That doesn’t mean a thing. There’s still love on both sides. It’s obvious, because neither of you have dated since the divorce.”

“Because we’re focused on being parents and our careers. That’s all.”

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that.” Mama slowly stood up and held her hand out to me. “Come in here so I can whip up something before Tim gets here. I want to tell you this story about your grandmother.”

I jokingly slapped her hand away, only to be met with a punch to my arm when I stood up. Without saying anything, I followed her, halfway paying attention to the story she was telling.

Moya was on my mind as she always was.

There was never a day that went by where I didn’t think about her, but being around my mother always made my thoughts deeper.

If what she felt was true, it would make me the happiest man alive. There was nothing I wanted more than having my family back, but deep down, I believed the damage was irreversible.

3

MOYA COLLIER

“I’m going to miss you, Bubba.”

Ocean tried to run from me, but I was too quick. Playfully, I grabbed his arm and engulfed him in my frame, planting kisses all over his chubby face. He loudly laughed as he tried to break free from me.

“Mommy, stop it!” he squealed, covering his face with his hands. “Okay, okay! I’ll take it, but you gotta stop it. I can’t breathe.”

He started dramatically heaving and acted like he was going to faint. To be seven, Ocean had some weight on him. He wasn’t chunky, just solid. I had the right mind to drop him on the ground, but I didn’t want to hurt him. When I acted like I was going to let go, he screamed so loud that my ears rang. His hands flew over his mouth as I stood him up right. We peered at one another and shared a laugh.

“I thought you were going to really drop me, Mommy,” he admitted with a smirk that heavily resembled his father.