Page 84 of Scarbound

“I thought she would be alone.” Noeul’s brow furrowed. “I didn’t know what else to do.”

“So you called her.”

“Yes.” His shoulders stiffened. “I left Ji-Woo on the couch and went into the kitchen. I remember my fingers slipping on the screen.”

“What happened when she answered?”

Noeul took a long breath. “She sounded… broken. And angry.” His eyes lifted. “I called her Eomeoni. I said, ‘Eomeoni, it’s Noeul. I just heard about Haneul.’” Noeul’s voice became distant. “She asked me what exactly I had heard. I told her I heard he was gone. I said I didn’t understand why he would do it.”

Noeul stopped. For several seconds, he couldn’t continue.

Dr. Kim spoke softly. “What did she say?”

Noeul’s jaw tightened. “She said maybe I should ask myself. Or my brother.” The room seemed to grow smaller. “She said Gong was the reason her son was dead.”

Dr. Kim watched the tension spread through his body. “And then?”

“She asked where I was.” Noeul’s voice roughened. “Where I was when Haneul needed me.” His breathing became uneven. “She said if I had really been his friend, I would have stopped it. She said I knew what Gong was doing.”

Noeul shook his head. “I told her I didn’t know how badly Haneul was suffering. I told her he never told me.”

“And what did she say?”

Noeul stared straight ahead. “She said he didn’t tell me because I wasn’t someone he could trust. She said I chose my brother over him.” A tear slid down his cheek. “And then she said it.”

Dr. Kim waited.

Noeul’s voice was almost inaudible. “‘You are responsible for my son’s death.’”

Dr. Kim gave him time.

Noeul wiped the tear away quickly, almost angrily. “I apologized.”

“To her?”

“Yes.”

“For what?”

Noeul looked at her as though the answer were obvious. “For Haneul.”

Dr. Kim shook her head slightly. “No. What did you believe you were apologizing for?”

Noeul opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Finally, he whispered, “For failing him.”

“Those are not the same thing.”

Noeul’s eyes hardened. “Maybe they are.”

“Are they?”

Noeul looked away. “She told me never to contact her again. Then she hung up.” He rubbed both hands over his face. “I stood there staring at the phone.”

“And what did you think?”

Noeul was silent for a long time. “What if she was right?”

Dr. Kim leaned back. “Do you still believe she was?”