Page 11 of Knot All Is Ruined: Part 1

“What, I’m a man, and just so we’re clear, this means you get off more than once as well. While this is a transaction between us, I think it’s only fair you get something out of it too. You seemed pretty happy with the sampling I gave you a few minutes ago,” Lucian rebutted. “The next question is do you want me to finish what I started and get it over with now or give yourself some time?”

While my libido was more than happy with the idea of him making me see stars again, I felt it was better to think about this after some sleep. “I’d rather have some time to adjust.”

“Fair enough, now get on the bed,” he ordered as he stood.

“What?” I blurted. “I just said no.”

“I’m not going to do anything to you, but you need to sleep next to me so that my scent is on you. If any other Alpha had an Omega at his disposal as I do you, there’s no way they wouldn’t be indulging in that gift as often as they could. If someone shows up here and you don’t have a shred of my scent on you, it will make it glaringly obvious I’m not doing what I should. With you sleeping next to me, it will solve that problem. Unless you really love sleeping on the floor?” Lucian questioned with a tilt of his head.

With an angry growl, I shoved up on my feet and climbed up on the bed putting my back firmly against the wall and crossing my arms over my chest as if that would ward him off. He just shook his head at me, then slipped under the covers and put his back to me. The bed itself wasn’t really meant for an Alpha his size to share with anyone, but if the goal was to have his scent on me that would be accomplished.

This time as I drifted off to sleep, I noticed that he wasn’t snoring in the slightest. Had that all been a ruse to see what I would do while he was asleep? God, just when I didn’t think I could find him more irritating or underhanded, he proved me wrong. Thankfully I was so worn out from the stress of the last few hours I fell asleep quickly. My dreams were filled with visions of me sitting by a warm fire sipping hot chocolate far, far away from here. One day…one day I would make that dream a reality with Tori and Violet right there with me.

Waking up, I felt so comfortable and warm almost as if I had a heated blanket wrapped around me. It was my favorite part of the cooler weather when we got to add those to our beds. I’d get in trouble for being late and not getting down to classes on time, but those extra five minutes were so worth it. Shifting, I tried to pull the blanket up to my chin, but instead of a blanket I found an arm nestled between my breasts with a hand gently holding my throat. Reality came crashing down on me, and I froze.

It would seem that sometime in the night, Lucian rolled over and tugged me to his chest. My head was resting on his other arm, his large hand splayed open as if it was waiting to catch something. While I knew he couldn’t help what happened when we were sleeping, this was exactly why I’d told him no cuddling. No matter what, I couldn't allow myself to have feelings for this man. It would be a terrible fate to develop hope and dreams about someone who would never see you as anything more than something to fuck and keep his father off his back.

I deserved more than that, not only as an Omega but as a person. No one should be in a loveless relationship. That might be naive of me, and quite possibly I’ve read too many romance novels which might possibly have skewed my expectations. Nevertheless, was it so wrong to dream of being loved?

Carefully I gripped his wrist and started to pull it away from my neck, not trusting him to have access to such a vulnerable spot. As I moved his arm, I thought I was in the clear when his arm tensed and the next thing I knew, I was being slammed against the wall. The hold on my neck had me pinned as I clawed at this arm to loosen his grip so I could breathe. Lucian’s scarred face loomed before me, a snarl on his lips before he finally seemed to register who I was.

Instantly he released me and threw himself off the bed, falling to the floor with a thud. Coughing as I sucked air into my lungs as tears burned in my eyes at the adrenaline that was coursing through my body. I’d cried in front of him last night, and that was going to be the last time I’d ever let that happen. Whatever might grow between us wouldn’t involve me showing my feelings and allowing him to use them against me.

“Danella, I’m so sorry,” Lucian said emphatically as he picked himself up off the floor. “I… I didn’t realize it was you. No one’s ever shared my bed with me before. Fuck,” he swore, running a hand through his hair that had come undone from its tiny ponytail.

He reached out to me, but I flinched and curled away from him. His hand pulled back then balled into a fist as if he was actually mad at himself for what he’d done. With a heavy sigh, he turned away from me and grabbed a few things out of his dresser.

“I’m going to clean up and see what I can make for breakfast.” With that announcement, he left the room, closing the door behind him.

Relaxing slightly, I let out a sob I’d been fighting back yet forced myself to focus on my breathing to help calm me down. Everything about Lucian had me utterly confused. One minute he was the commander of the Northern Asturg army, then the next he was an insecure Alpha who seemed to be fucking everything up. The way he held me when I woke up was as if he was shielding me from whatever dangers there might be.

Once I felt calm enough, I got up from the bed, pulled up the covers, and replaced the pillow in its spot. While I’d been stuck up here for two weeks waiting for whoever lived here to return, I’d made routines to give me something to do with my time. Now it seems to have become a habit. Since Lucian hadn’t felt the need to unchain me from the wall, I used my bucket toilet. I’d gotten over the humiliation since my other alternative was to piss myself, which would only make this experience worse. Besides, Lucian was the one who’d have to empty it out since I couldn’t.

Another routine I’d made for myself was doing simple exercises so I wouldn’t get stiff or weak. It was hard to run for your life if you’d become so weak you couldn’t even make a run for it. We’d had physical fitness classes at the Care Center twice a week to help keep our bodies healthy. So I just picked from the exercises I could remember and made up some others that were modifications of ones I couldn’t do in my confines.

Typically I would finish all of this by the time the guard would come up and drop off a canteen of water and a tray of food. Sometimes they would leave me edible food, while other days they would do things to it, making it impossible to eat. When they discovered that I didn’t eat it, they threatened to beat me or tell Lucian when he got back so he would discipline me for wasting food. The previous day they’d mixed sand in with my gruel, and I hadn’t figured it out until I’d shoved a spoonful in my mouth, bastards.

Granted that didn’t start until after I spat in that one Beta’s face when he pinned me against the wall and groped my boobs. “Don’t worry, little Omega, I’m just getting a sample of what I’ll get to play with once Lucian tosses you aside, regardless of wearing his mark.”

It had been one of those moments where my gut reaction had been the wrong choice. When that wad of spit landed on his face, the rage that contorted his features had me truly fearing I might not live much longer. Thankfully there had been another man with him, and he pulled the Beta off me before he could do more than slam my head against the wall. Since then, more often than not, my food was fucked with; a way they could retaliate and not get in trouble for it.

The bedroom door opened, and Lucian walked in with his hair damp, smelling much cleaner, and in a fresh pair of black pants and a black t-shirt. In his hands were a large glass of water and something that looked like a biscuit with a delicious smell of egg wafting over to me. The growl that came from my stomach had me blushing and looking away from him.

“Come sit at the desk and eat,” Lucian instructed.

“I can’t,” I said, pointing to my ankle. “The chain won’t go that far.”

Almost as if he'd forgotten about that minor detail, he headed back out of the room but didn’t bother closing the door. I could see him walking into the kitchen area and pulling open a drawer, grabbing something, and coming back to kneel before me.

“Know that if you run from me, Danella,” he started, then looked me in the eyes. “I will find you, no matter how far you run. I’m one of the best trackers this military has, so just forget the idea. I’ve promised to free you once my father is gone, but until then you’re mine to be responsible for.”

I didn’t respond, knowing that no matter what he said I was going to find a way to get the fuck out of here. All he’d done was help me by letting me know he was their best tracker. Now I just needed to learn what other skills people around here had, so when I found my chance I knew what I was up against. The feeling of having the metal cuff off my ankle was almost like getting some hope back. If he left me free to roam around his home, it would give me many more options.

“Sit,” he ordered, pointing at the desk. “It’s not much, but it seems we got a shipment of food a few days ago. Enjoy the biscuit and eggs. They’re a treat, so savor them. It will be back to gruel tomorrow.”

Even though I wanted to do just as he said and eat this slowly, I was so hungry I couldn’t hold myself back from shoving it in my face. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him picking up the tray and scowling down at the bowl while poking at it with the spoon.

“Danella, did you put the sand in your food?” he asked, the warning clear in his tone. If my answer was yes, I would have been in massive amounts of trouble.