Tom wanted Clara to stay more than anything but he could also see what a great posting this was. He would never dream of trying to hold her back.
‘Hmm. Well, that’s the thing. I’m not so sure it will be.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘It is a great opportunity and all that but maybe I’d rather stay. I don’t want to leave the place I love and everyone from here. Maybe it’s not worth the promotion.’
Tom sat back and looked at Clara.
‘You’ll make friends soon enough and new memories. Isn’t that worth it for you?’
‘Not really, no. I’ve given it so much thought, Tom. I don’t want to go. I want to stay here in Oxford where I belong, with you.’
‘But hasn’t Lawrence already found someone to replace you?’
‘Yes. He has. Slight problem there. I’ve really messed things up, haven’t I?’
‘No, you haven’t but I don’t know how it works with Stephen being told he’s got your job.’
‘Nor me. But, if the worst comes to the worst, I’ll take some time off. Maybe it’s too late to save my job but I’ve decided that I’m turning down Cambridge. I’ve made my decision and nothing will make me change my mind. I want to be withyou.’
‘Oh, Clara. I want to be with you more than anything in the world, but I don’t want you making this decision because of me.’
‘No, it’s not all because of you, I promise; I’ve given it so much thought. I can’t do it. I have everything I could dream of here in Oxford. It’s my home and I have my friends andyouare the icing on the cake. I’d be mad to leave all I’ve got.’
‘Goodness. That’s wonderful news for everyone here but what will King’s College say?’
‘I’ll have to deal with it. I’ll explain. It’s not ideal but it’s better that I back out now than a week into the position. They said they had lots of applicants. I’m sure someone will absolutely jump at it.’
‘I would imagine so.’
Now that Clara had made the decision and informed Tom, she knew she was doing the right thing. She had never been more certain of anything in her life. It was just a shame that she had muddled everything up for everyone before she realised what she had.
‘Sometimes you don’t realise how lucky you are until you’re about to lose it all.’
‘You can say that again,’ said Tom, his foot reaching out for Clara’s underneath the table. ‘In fact, it must be my lucky day. Since we’re staying put, I can tell you about some exciting news.’
‘Ooh, sounds good.’
‘It is. I didn’t want to say anything earlier, as I wouldn’t have wanted to influence your decision but when I was in rehab, I was thinking about how much I wanted to give something back to other people after all the help I’ve been given. Before I found out about your possible move, I looked into doing a psychology and counselling course. I applied to one in Oxford and this morning found out I’d been accepted. I was going to turn it down, but now it looks like I might be able to accept it.’
‘Oh, Tom! That’s wonderful news. Absolutely incredible. You’ll make such a terrific counsellor.’
‘Thanks. It’s different to being an accountant but it’s now or never and this feels a lot more rewarding than helping people fill in their tax returns.’
‘I would think so. I can’t believe you’d consider turning something so wonderful down for me though. That’s very naughty of you.’
‘No, I’d have found a course elsewhere, but right now getting things on track for us is my priority. I wish the same could be said about Josh.’
‘I’ve been thinking about that. I want to help you rekindle things with Josh. If I’m off for a while, I can help trace him. Perhaps I can reach out on your behalf.’
‘You’d do that for me?’
‘Of course. I’d do most things for you, Tom. Nothing illegal though; hopefully that goes without saying.’ Clara laughed.
‘I don’t know what to say. It would make me so happy if he’d speak to me again.’
‘Good, that’s all I want. I can’t promise you anything, so don’t get your hopes up. But I’m not too bad at negotiating peace normally. I’ll do what I can.’
