The Sun Deck didn’t look like any deck I’d ever seen before. It was more like a glamorous rooftop bar, with its white tables and rattan chairs covered in floppy, green cushions. Brooke was already on the bubbles when we walked in, sat on a sofa-swing, looking chic in lilac silk.
‘There y’all are. What took ya so long?’ Her dress billowed in the breeze as she rocked to and fro, with both bikini straps on show.
‘Sorry to keep you waiting, Brooke,’ Leo said, swooping in for an entirely unnecessary double kiss and making it awkward for the rest of us. Should we line up and take it in turns to kiss her hand and curtsy? I decided a quick wave would suffice and Heidi followed suit.
‘Hiiii! Wow!!! Look at this place,’ I breathed. ‘It’s beautiful!’
‘Isn’t it just?’ Brooke turned her face up to the sun.
‘It shouldn’t even need PR,’ Heidi added, laying it on thick.
‘Oh, but it does me darlin.’Uh-oh.She’d walked straight into that one. ‘The Cool Cruisers campaign just ain’t workin’ for the young ones.’
Zach guffawed under his breath. We’d been running Cool Cruisers with top-performing influencers for the past three years, and it absolutelywasworking, but it was difficult to challenge her without looking defensive. The campaign followed couples who shared their holiday stories to demonstrate how cruising the Excalibur way was far superior to anything else. OAPs being treated like royalty, forty-somethings celebrating birthdays and partying like it was 1999, and adventure-seekers wanting to visit maximum countries in minimum time. It showed the full spectrum ofcustomers and meant people could always see themselves as the target audience. It wasn’t just for the newly wed, overfed and nearly dead.
‘Excuse me?’ Brooke clicked her fingers at a passing waiter. ‘Can you pour my friends some champagne too, please?’
‘Not for me, thanks,’ Leo piped up. ‘I’ll take a water.’Oh no. He was one of those.
‘Two waters, as well, please,’ she said, pivoting easily, and the waiter strode off. ‘Are you low or no alcohol?’
‘Neither,’ Leo said, eyes sparkling. ‘But if I start on the champagne now, I’ll be asleep before dinner.’
A cruising four-ball meandered past us, squealing with laughter as they carried an ice bucket and two pints to the sunny side of the deck. The women looked glamorous, yet full of mischief and the men were cracking jokes, their neatly parted hair thick with gel. It felt strange to watch someone else’s holiday from the sidelines. Being on a cruise with people I’d never normally hang out with, or eat with, or sit next to in a swimming costume. My inner voice told me to relax as I inhaled the salty sea air and the smell of coconut sun cream. But I couldn’t. I had to stay on guard. Amplify were the enemy, no matter how friendly and casual Leo tried to play it. I’d fallen for his tricks once before, and I’d be damned if I let it happen again.
‘OK, ladies and gents. We are gathered here today to witness the…’ Brooke laughed. ‘No. Let’s get serious. I want to talk you through how the next two weeks are gonna go. It’s important you have a good time on theEsmeralda, without havingtoo muchof a good time, if you know what I mean.’
I didn’t know what she meant. And from Heidi’s face, I could see she had no idea either. Was she implying we’dbe getting boozed up and playing naked Twister with the guests? Throwing up over the sides? What was her version oftoo much? I daren’t mention the cabins again, but the thought of any jiggy stuff happening in those bunk beds was ludicrous.
‘You are completely free to explore the boat and enjoy theExcalibur Experiencein whatever way you please,’ she said, which was music to my ears. Heidi and I could indulge ourselves without worrying about having to entertain Brooke or hang out with Leo and Zach. ‘And we’ll have dinner together in the evening to touch base. I’ve already booked us onto the captain’s table for Friday night.’
‘That’s incredibly kind,’ Heidi gushed.
‘Sokind,’ Zach echoed and she gave him a look. ‘Almost too kind,’ he said, innocently.
‘But we wouldn’t expect you to host us every single night,’ she continued, wrapping up rejection in concern for Brooke’s time. Heidi didn’t fancy fourteen client all-nighters in a row, and neither did I.
‘What an honour,’ Leo interjected. ‘We’ll be there with bells on, won’t we, Zach?’
Zach gave a fractional nod and mustered a smile.
‘As will we,’ I said, quickly matching him. ‘Thank you for the invitation.’
‘If you’re sure you don’t mind,’ Heidi added, trying to course-correct.
‘Not at all, honey. It’s already arranged. We’ll have other guests with us as well, to give us all chance to get the inside track.’
‘Great idea,’ Leo said, sipping his water. ‘Insights in real time.’
‘Then in addition to dinner, there are one or two activities we’ve arranged,’ Brooke said, with a glint in her eye.
Zach frowned. ‘What kind of activities?’
‘Dahlia, who you met last night, has put a fantastic schedule together, to make sure you maximise your time here and see a variety of entertainment. The ship is so big, it’s easy to miss out if you’re not careful.’
As if on cue, Dahlia bounded over, her big curls bouncing around her gold hoop earrings. She was in a sporty version of the Excalibur uniform: a mint green sports bra and matching joggers with the tiny sword logo gleaming gold.
‘Hey there, VIPs,’ she sang, full of enthusiastic pep. ‘Fancy running into you guys again!’
