I swallow. I want to reach out to him, but I know it’s too soon, no matter how much my flesh aches for him. ‘Kyor, you don’t have to have all the answers all the time.’
A scoff crackles in the air.
‘I’m the Crown Prince of Morathka. I don’t get to be fallible.’He shakes his head like he’s annoyed with himself for saying even that much. ‘You’re still exhausted. You need to rest now, Rose.’
Never would I have thought my name could feel so hard, and though I know that’s not the way he intended it to be, any name other than Thorn on his tongue feels like it’s made of stone.
Still, that he speaks to me at all feels like a miracle.
In front of us, the fire spits, sending glowing embers into the sky as the warmth soaks slowly into my bones.
The camp is quiet again. Ruben has his arms wrapped around Benny in the hug of warmth he well deserves. Caz is helping Loch settle in for the night as the Sannings take their places, exhaustion finally beginning to claim its due.
Maybe I should move too, claim my own space away from Kyor. As it is, he sits barely a hand away from me. Easy enough to reach out and place a hand against his thigh. Or to lean forward and place my lips against his. Both actions would be beyond foolish, and yet words push themselves past the lump in my throat before I can stop them.
‘Kyor,’ I say, surprised by the fear that grips me as I speak. ‘Will you stay?’
He looks at me for a long moment, something raw and unguarded in his eyes, as though we both know I’m not talking of just tonight.
‘I nearly lost you,’ he whispers. ‘I can’t do that again.’
My heart throbs. Nearly lost me? Does he mean because of Benny or because of Fen? And does that mean I haven’t lost him yet?
Tears sting my eyes as I whisper the words again. ‘Will you stay with me?’
This time, his lips press against the top of my head before he responds.
‘Always.’
Chapter 48
When I awaken, my limbs feel heavy. My body wants me to turn over and go back to sleep, but the bustling of the camp around me tells me it is time to get moving.
Reluctantly, I open my eyes and stretch. The sky is grey and heavy, the previously burning tree trunk now nothing more than a pile of ash. Sure enough, the others are up and packing their belongings, save for Kyor, who is still by my side as if he feared leaving me sleeping for even a moment.
As I sit up, I feel the rest of the group eyeing Kyor and me, noting our unusually close position. But even more intrusive than their speculative gazes is the new presence within me.
In sleep, our minds became helplessly tangled again.
Fen’s joy at being reunited with Elska is sharp, his relief at being alive just as keen, and his guilt – at feeling such joy while Zelle is dead and gone – sucker-punches me.
Trembling, I reach out and touch the earth next to me, let my fingers curl into the cold, hard ground.
‘You got this?’ Kyor asks, aware of exactly what I’m doing as I focus on breathing in and out.
I nod once and he rises, moving away, giving me space todisentangle my thoughts from Fen’s. The process is gradual and not something I intend to rush. Only when I’m sure he and I are two beings again do I hesitantly reach out to him.
How are you feeling, big guy?
I am well. His answer is flat and stubborn, as if he will never give me any other answer to that question.Do not call me ‘big guy’. I am no man.
Big wolf?I offer.
He sniffs.I am not a mere wolf, Little Raven. I am adirewolf.
Well, if we’re being technical about it, I’m not a raven.
Little Raven is a dignified nickname.He sniffs.Big guy is a soldier with brawn and no brains, and a dick that scrapes on the ground.
