‘She’s nothing like you,’ I reply, and from the satisfied little sound that passes down the phone line, I can tell she’s chosen to take it as a compliment. But still, it’s not enough. I don’t want her even thinking about Mia. ‘She’s an English student, super nerdy, you know the type. Kind of sad, honestly. Just a Waffle House waitress.’
Her dismissive little laugh cuts me up like nails on a chalkboard but at least I know I’ve done a good job of throwing her off Mia’s scent.
I’m about to say goodbye when I hear a girl’s voice in the background, a hand over the receiver, muffled words I can’t understand. It sounds like Kylie, her best friend, but I can’t be sure. It’s so long since I spoke to any of our friends. Her friends now.
‘Well, I gotta go,’ she says brightly, a whole different person. ‘Sure was great to hear from you.’
‘Who’s there?’
‘Kylie. We’ll talk again real soon, okay?’
‘No, we won’t,’ I say with a sad smile.
‘No,’ she replies, sunny disposition faltering. ‘I guess not.’
‘Bye, Bre.’
I don’t wait for her goodbye before I end the call. Still slumped against the wall, I let my head fall backwards and close my eyes, replaying everything in my mind, and if I didn’t hear the door to the flat on my right open then quickly close, I might’ve stayed there for the rest of the day.
‘Phone’s all yours,’ I call out to whoever is waiting but there’s no response. Maybe I sound as pathetic as I feel. Unable to summonthe energy it would take to stand, I crawl over to the stairs before pulling myself up with the handrail, skulking down to the ground floor, alternately worrying about Bre, feeling guilty about Chris, hoping I’ll see Mia and dreading the inevitable interaction, all at the same time.
Whoever said college is the best time of your life had no idea what they were talking about.
39
Mia
When I leave the library, I feel a little better. Not good exactly, but better. There’s still a lot of work to do if I want to pull up my grade and pass this class but I’ve never been afraid of hard work.
It’s almost two and there’s no time to drop my notes off in my room if I’m planning to meet Jenna and Alice for the boat race so I dash out, pulling my jacket around me and wishing I’d brought a warmer coat. When I see him sitting on the front steps of the library, I have my claw clip in my mouth, both my hands looped in my hair. I’m not ready. My entire body goes still when our eyes meet.
‘Mia.’
Oliver stands up, dark circles under his eyes, his perfectly dishevelled hair considerably less perfect than normal.
‘Mia?’ He says my name again when I walk right by him and it takes a couple of seconds for him to chase after me. I’m a little surprised that he does.
‘I am so sorry. My behaviour last night was inexcusable.’ His long legs let him overtake me fast and he stands right in front of me, blocking the path. ‘Please talk to me, I’ve been waiting ages.’
‘How did you know I was at the library?’
‘I went to find you in halls but you weren’t there, then I saw Alice and Jenna at The Snug. They had some feedback for me on my behaviour.’
The corners of my mouth flicker at the thought.
‘But that was hours ago,’ I say. ‘And it’s freezing out.’
‘Is it?’
In nothing but his standard leather blazer and vintage tee, Oliver looks around as though he hasn’t noticed.
‘I didn’t want to disturb you. And, well, let’s be honest. I needed some time to work on my apology.’
‘Today is the day for them,’ I mutter before dodging around him and continuing on the path towards the boathouse.
‘I was a dickhead last night,’ he says, back on my heels. ‘A complete dickhead. The gig was a shitshow and then the argument with the boys in the band, I was not in the right frame of mind for us.’
‘You were in the right frame of mind for those other two girls.’
