“Imean, hell, I walked out of Kylie’s life right after we got married because Ithought she couldn’t handle the fact that I needed more than only she couldoffer. I had to admit to myself and to my family that I’m bisexual. No oneturned me away, E. The people who love you are much stronger than you give themcredit for. Sometimes it just takes time to realize that.”
Ethanswallowed past the lump in his throat. Travis, the one word wonder, just saidmore in the last five minutes than Ethan had heard from him in… well, probablyin years.
“Idon’t want him to get hurt,” Ethan stated, keeping his gaze trained on Travis.“Coming out is going to put him right in the line of fire.”
“Youthink Beau doesn’t know that already? Give him some credit, E. He’s a grown manand can make his own decisions. He doesn’t need you making them for him. Socome up with a different excuse because that’s bullshit and you know it.”
Theharshness of Travis’ words sparked the dry embers of his anger and Ethan glaredat him. “It’s not bullshit. You haven’t been there. You haven’t been beatenbecause of who you love. You haven’t suffered the loss of someone who tooktheir own life because they couldn’t deal with not being accepted.”
Travislooked stunned, and Ethan felt a measure of satisfaction. That didn’t last longbecause he suddenly felt sick.
“Whatare you talking about?” Travis asked, his voice low, his words coming outslowly.
“Me,dammit! And look what it’s done to the family. Dad ends up in jail because ofme.”
“Dadwasn’t in jail. He wasn’t arrested.” Travis paused. “You better start talking,Ethan.”
Ethanwasn’t sure why this was coming up again, why he was caught off guard by thepain and anger that had been brewing inside of him for years. He couldn’t keepit in any longer. “Why? So you can go on a rampage too? Are you going to goafter Jimmy Reardon for beating me? For damn near killing me because I was inlove with his brother? Maybe I deserved it. Maybe I still do. Gavin’s dead,goddammit! He’s fucking dead because of me!”
Ethanshot to his feet, and Travis did the same. Before he could storm out of theroom, he was embraced in Travis’ powerful grip, and he lost it. Every emotionhe’d been holding back rose to the surface and exploded like a volcaniceruption. Angry tears blurred his eyes as he held on to Travis for dear life.
Hehad no idea how long Travis stood there, hugging him tightly before he finallycalmed down, but when he stepped back, he didn’t see the pity in Travis’ eyeslike he expected.
“Isthat why Dad went after Jimmy?”
Ofcourse, Travis was going to linger onthatpiece of information he’dshared.
“Idon’t know. I didn’t ask him. He’s not supposed to know, but he does.” Ethanalready knew how that happened, and though he understood Sawyer’s reasoning, hestill felt betrayed because he’d been led to believe all these years that noone knew. Ethan continued, “Which means he’s out to get Jimmy the same waySawyer is. The same way everyone will be. And it won’t change anything. Itwon’t bring Gavin back.”
“Gavin?He’s Jimmy’s brother?”
“Yeah,”Ethan said, the anger draining out of him and leaving him feeling weak andpathetic. He dropped onto the edge of the coffee table and stared down at hishands and before he knew it, Ethan shared the whole sordid story with Travis.Everything. From loving Gavin to finding him dead and every horrible detail inbetween.
Travispaced the floor for a long time. While he was making tracks on the hardwood,Ethan made his way over to check on Mason. The little boy was sleeping soundly.Ethan just wanted to hold him. To cradle him against his chest and absorb someof the innocence from him.
Ethanheard the front door open, and he spun around to see Travis walking out. “Whereare you going?” he asked, already scared that Travis was going to do somethingthat he’d never be able to take back. Something that would ruin their livesforever.
“Don’tworry about me, E. I’m smarter than you give me credit for.”
Ethanwasn’t so sure about that.
“Dome a favor.”
Ethannodded, waiting to hear what the favor was.
“TellBeau. Tell him how you feel. He deserves to hear it. And you deserve to behappy.”
“Ialready have,” he said to the empty space that Travis had just vacated. “Butdon’t worry, I can do you one better,” he added for good measure.
Ethangrabbed his phone from his hip and typed in a quick text.
Can I stop by tonight? Want to seeyou.
Chapter Thirty Seven
??
Beauran a towel through his wet hair as he headed to the kitchen. He was starving,but he doubted there’d be anything worthwhile in his refrigerator. Pulling openthe door, the entire fridge shook from standing on unbalanced legs, and hesighed. A quick look inside and his suspicions were confirmed. Nothing except abottle of ketchup, a carton of eggs that were no doubt expired, and a six packof water.
