My father was not expressive of his love for me, but I knew he did love me in his own way. And he was always there, tolerating me through all my tantrums and self-loathing. He provided me with everything he could, except he couldn’t give me the one thing I always asked for from him when I was still a pup—a mother.
“What did Zahra tell you?” I asked my mate as she folded the letter neatly.
“It’s better if you hear it from her.”
“I want to know. Now.” I stood up from the couch after I carefully placed Nadia to the side.
“Riley… Don’t be too hard on yourself.” She stood up as she faced me while I stood in the middle of the library.
“You’ll never understand what I’m going through right now. All my entire fucking life, he made me believe my mother was his fucking mate. I grew resentful of all Alpha Females because, like her, I believed they were incapable of remaining loyal to their mates. It was the fucking reasonI was drawn to Andrea because she was an Omega and for me, Omegas were way fucking better than Alpha Females.”
“Riley…”
“But it still doesn’t change a thing. She didn’t come back, did she? She didn’t even fucking visit me. Katya would tell me that when you wish on a full moon, the Goddess would hear it loud and clear, and if you were a good pup, she might grant your wishes! And I did my best to excel and be a good pup, but it was not enough! Everything I did was not fucking enough for her to come back!” I didn’t notice that tears were streaming down my face until I saw Nadia’s tear-stricken face. “She never came! I waited for her through all my birthdays until I was eight, but she never came! So whatever reason she comes up with is still bullshit.”
“Riley! Your father rolled off an Alpha command on her...” Her voice broke, and it irritated me that she was taking her side.
“Now that Dad is gone, it is so fucking easy to say that. She could make up stories and I would still never believe her.” I swatted the tears off my face before I turned around and was about to walk towards the door. “I have work to do. I will see you later.”
“Please, don’t walk away from me. I know it’s not my story to tell, but did you remember when you were probably 16 or 17, and you were at the neutral city?”
I stopped in my tracks and turned to face her, one hand on my hips while the other hand was on my mouth, pressing and cupping my lips just to stop myself from swearing more.
“She said it looked like you were with other young Alphas because of the aura surrounding your group. And then you clutched your head and your nose started bleeding? Did it happen? Did you remember that?”
I swallowed hard, my forehead creasing.How did she know about this?Unless Darvin told her about this occasion.
Darvin, Aeon, Lucas, and I were out in the neutral city hanging out when my head was struck with too much pain and my nose began bleeding. But it was over in an instant.
“And then, all of a sudden, the head pain stops and the bleeding stops.” Nadia continued. “Zahra was there. She wanted to reach out to you, but she couldn’t. Every time she comes near you, it hurts you. She told me there were other instances before that, but that was the last one. Shetried Riley. But she couldn’t stand seeing you twitch in pain every single time she attempted to.”
Nadia was talking so fast that if I was paying too much attention to her, I would miss out on everything she was saying.
“I have a meeting in twenty minutes. I need to go.” I went back to where she was standing and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
I walked away and left her in the library. I know I shouldn’t have, but I was lost for words. I had to let everything sink in first or I would lose my fucking mind at the moment.
Was my father that fucking cruel to do this to me? I thought he loved me?
Chapter 75
NADIA.
Riley has refused totalk about the incident since last night.
We made love and cuddled the whole night, and talked about us and our pup but I didn’t dare ask about Zahra. I would let him handle it this time, at his own pace.
By morning, he went back to work like nothing happened and was back in his Alpha mode. It was not that I was complaining, but I was worried because he wasn’t letting me in on his emotions. His walls were up except when we discussed our pup, then he would let me in on what he felt. But I dared not push him to say anything.
I could wait. And Zahra too.
I spent the rest of the afternoon with Jenny and all the other expectant females doing simple routines to strengthen our pelvic muscles. But to be honest, we spent more time just talking and swooning over our own mates. I thought I was the only one, but apparently, pregnant women find their mates’ scents more alluring. I finally figured out why I always have the urge to jump at my mate just at the mere sight of him. I thought it was because I missed him too much.
By the time I was done with my session with Jenny and the other females, I was already missing him. Since after breakfast, he had been on the other side of the territory, and I was eager to see him now. I went looking for him inside the packhouse, but he was nowhere around. I bumped into Gamma Sebastian and he told me he was at the archery range.
With steady footsteps, I made my way to the back of the training grounds and found him sitting on the boulder facing the target heads. He was just sitting there, no bows and arrows around him. He might have just chosenthis place to think, and now that I thought of it, I didn’t know if I should approach or just leave him alone for a while.
“Are you having second thoughts about whether to approach me or leave me alone?” His voice echoed around us. He didn’t turn around and remained fixated on the view in front of him, but I could imagine him smirking as he said those words.
