I fucking knew it.
Knew she was broken like me.
I just don’t know why.
I’m faced with two divergent paths. One is the route the FBI agent should take. I set out to earn her trust, and I’ve clearly done that. Her walls are down, so now is when I should ask the hard questions and find out what I need to know.
The second path is the one the man should take. A man helplessly enamored with her, who wants nothing more than to mean to her what she means to me. To be honest and forthright. Comfort her and accept her for who she is.
I don’t know which path to take.
Where is Morgan Freeman when I need him?
Maybe I can figure out how to do both.
Hoping this doesn’t backfire, I calmly ask, “Is that why you got involved with someone like Silas?”
Still avoiding my gaze, she wipes a stray tear from her cheek. “What do you mean?”
“Maybe what he offered was exciting. Perhaps you thought that going along with it would make you feel alive.” I pause to gauge her reaction before adding, “I don’t know. I’m just wondering how you ended up in his orbit. He’s dangerous.”
“Getting involved with Silas was the second biggest mistake of my life.”
That’s a bold statement.
Instead of asking her to elaborate, I wait her out. I suspect she’s on the verge of revealing her cards.
I bet shewantsto tell me. Needs it even.
But she’s frightened.
“I met Silas at the casino. I fell for his flirty act. Honestly, it was flattering since most men ignore me.” She clicks her tongue dismissively. “I should’ve known better than to trust a guy with dimples.”
For the first time since the conversation took this solemn turn, she chances a look at me. And her glare is loaded with accusation, as if my dimples are to blame for her choices.
I’d like to laugh or tease her about that, but I don’t. I’ll keep waiting. If I know Lila, she’ll fill the silence.
Plus, if I speak now, I’ll reveal how much her comment about men ignoring her enrages me.
While picking at the hem of her shorts, she struggles to reaffix her smile. Eventually, she gets a half-assed version of her syrupy mask in place. “I’m glad he’s in my past.”
My inner lie detector buzzes. Is she lying about him being in her past, or that she’s glad about it? I bet I know.
“But he isn’t in your past, is he?”
Scoffing, she says, “I broke up with him.”
“Well, at least you’re deflecting with your words, rather than nonsense this time. I guess that’s an improvement.”
She rolls her eyes. “Why do you care so much about Silas? Are you worried my heart might belong to another?”
Yes. Also no. But mostly yes.
“The longer you avoid answering, the guiltier you look. I’d say he’s still very much in your present.”
“The vibes were off about him. He was creeping me out.”
I caress her shoulder, hoping she can feel my sincerity through my touch. “Lila, if you’re in trouble, I can help you.”
