“Tell him that.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Just picking up a few things. Briel’s downstairs, waiting in the car. We just grabbed some lunch.”
I tried to kick him but he grabbed my foot. “Get out of my bed and go be with your girlfriend,” I said.
“This is my bed, dork.”
“Well, get out of your bed and let me sulk.”
“No.” Gavin blinked and swallowed. This was Gavin’s tell forI’m about to say something you’re not going to like. “I told Lance I would leave you alone if he got help.”
I felt a stabbing ache in my chest. “Leave me alone? As in what?”
“You know.”
“You can’t do that.” Tears started forming in my eyes. “You can’t do that.”
“I didn’t know what else to say. I need to protect you.” He wiped a tear from my cheek and whispered, “I’m sorry. I hate to see you break like this.”
“Don’t do that. I’m not breaking. You think you’re protecting me by never talking to me again?” I scowled.
Closing his eyes, he said. “I’ll figure it out.”
“Tell me something, Gavin. When will this happen?”
“When will what happen?”
“When will we stop talking forever? When will we stop being there for each other? When have you agreed to stop being my best friend? Huh, fucker? Answer me. When will we never talk again?”
He didn’t say anything for a long time. His eyes remained closed until he finally spoke. “When one of us dies, I guess.”
“Exactly, and you know it’s true.”
He gave me a bow. One I needed so desperately. A second later, he sat up abruptly and moved to straddle me.
“Ouch, get off me!”
“No.” He pinned my arms above my head and ran his gaze down my body. “You’re a mess and you’ve had that T-shirt and those underwear since we were in college. I know you can afford underwear, P. Go shopping. Call Ling and have dinner with her. Eat something, for the love of God. You look like a waif.”
I was still pinned. Turning my head to look away from him, I said, “No!”
He ran his tongue up the side of my face. I wiggled and squirmed. “Ahh, gross! Get off me!”
“So very cute,” came a French accent from the doorway.
Gavin jumped off me onto the floor, still smiling. Apparently, he didn’t care what Briel thought. I pulled the covers up to my neck. “Hi, Briel. Gavin was just leaving.”
“And Penny was just rolling her depressed ass out of bed and into the shower.”
“Fine,” I grumbled.
LING FLEW INthat evening. “I was going to come anyway, so good thing you actually want me there,” she said over the phone. I was so glad she knew what I needed before I did.
We stayed up late eating junk food and watching reruns ofWho’s Line Is It Anyway?She didn’t press me on anything, but she already knew the whole story from Gavin, Kiki, and the little fragments I had given to her.
The next day, Ling took me to the mall. I got three new outfits, five pairs of fancy underwear, and a bikini wax, which I had never had and never will again. Ling said I needed to feel good and confident when I eventually faced Lance. All I felt was pain.
