I had a drink at six on the dot, and at seven Ling and I sat down at a fancy restaurant, where I ordered a margarita.
“There’s no answers in the bottle, Penny,” Ling said.
“Are you shrinking me, Ling?”
“God, no. I’m just saying getting drunk is not going to make you feel any better.”
“Isn’t that what you’re here for... to watch me get drunk? I’m going through shit, my friend.”
“It’s a phase. And no that’s not why I’m here.” She shook her head and looked away, seemingly disappointed. “Tell me this: did you stay with Lance because of the money and security?”
I rolled my eyes. “You know that’s not true. I stayed with Lance because I thought it was the right thing to do for Milo.”
“Was it?”
“Youareshrinking me.”
“No, I’m just talking to you.”
I downed the last of my margarita. “It was the right thing to do for Milo. Gavin was unstable, fickle, all over the place for so long.”
“Is he now?”
“I don’t know.”
“Besides college and his one fuckup, hasn’t he always been there for you?” She raised her eyebrows. She already knew the answer.
“I’m just tired of fighting that fight. I’m tired of fighting for Gavin and justifying myself to Lance.”
“I’m just tired of watching you make your life decisions based on the men in your life,” she replied coolly. That stung, but it made sense coming from her. Ling was eternally single by choice, and she said what she felt. Having no significant other allowed her to roam through life without a filter. To be herself. I envied her. She was a great friend to me, but we had vastly different outlooks on life.
I thought she would lecture me more or say I told you so, but she said nothing after that. Finally, I asked, “Ling, do you think I should leave Lance?”
“Honestly, yes. I don’t think you’ll ever be happy with him and I think it’s selfish what you’re doing.” I knew she’d say that.
“I know.” I paused, looking around the restaurant. “Let’s get outta here. How ’bout the Tipsy Hat?”
“That dive with the cover bands?”
“Yeah! C’mon, it’ll be fun. We’ll dance.”
Little did I know, Ling was already calling in reinforcements.
30.Three Months Ago
GAVIN
Ling: Tiny Dancer still can’t hold her liquor.
Me: On my way. I had a feeling. What’s she doing?
Ling: Don’t text and drive. She’s hanging on the bartender at the Tipsy Hat.
Me: Masen? The guy with the piercings?
Ling: The very same. Quit texting and driving. I have a 6 a.m. flight. I’m a freaking doctor and can’t stay out at all hours of the night like this. Just get your ass over here. I’m catching an Uber to the Marriott by the airport. You can take over from here.
Me: Don’t leave. Wait until I get there.
