“You really like him, huh?” I hate myself for the way my voice breaks. I hate that it’s so obvious how jealous I am.
But I still don’t see this coming.
Su-Lin pulls away from me and shoves me hard with both hands. I fall out from behind the pillar and roll onto the marble, getting my feet under me. She’s up on her knee now, glaring at me with a ferocity I’ve only seen from her onTV, in that moment when Chad Montgomery admitted it was him who fucked her puppet.
“No!” she screams at me. “I do notreally likeWarren, Brendan! Because I’m in love withyou!”
My mouth falls open, but no sound comes out. Meanwhile, my heart is doing a crazy dance like it’s just been brought back from the dead.
She loves me.
She loves me.
She loves me.
I must have hardcore misread this situation, because she’s saying that she loves me.
All the tipsy people on the couches are turning as one to look at us, but she just keeps going.
“But youkissedher! I hate that you did that, and I know that’s wrong, because it technically wasn’t against the rules. But it sucks that you wanted to. And it sucks that you did that. And I’m mad at you, even though I shouldn’t be.”
“Hey,” I say softly, like I’m trying to reduce her hysteria by being extra calm, even though I feel anything but. Because oh god, she saw me kissing Jane andshehas misreadthatsituation and, um, I guess that was my moment, after all.
Su-Lin continues to shout over me. “And why did it have to beJane, of all people? I mean, fine, yeah, she has anice rackand I could never be sexy like her or make you feelintense passionlike Candace. So that’s fine.That’s justfine. I hope you two will be very happy.”
“Su-Lin,” I say, “that’s not—”
“I don’t want to hear it! I don’t want to hear about how you can’t bring yourself to want me.The Plan was supposed for be forus, but you only ever wanted me because you felt safe with me, and you used me and that sucks and I hate you for it.”
With that, she gathers up her skirts and runs out of the conference center in her sneakers, leaving me staring after her, her words echoing in my mind, and all the drunk people still watching me. I’m pretty sure a couple of them have their phones out. One guy on the couch nearest to me mutters, “Damn.”
I have some stronger words I’d like to use at that moment, but instead, I burst into tears.
Twenty-three
Su-Lin
I’m a total mess. I just shoved my best friend and screamed—very publicly—about how I love him and how he kissed Jane and also how I hate him for it, and (surprise!) this somehow didn’t make me feel any better. If anything, I feel worse.
Worse, because I’m pathetic, and I threw myself in this horribly embarrassing way at Warren, and that’s the only reason Brendan came out to see me, because Warren probably told him I’m having a nervous breakdown. Which I am, like some table-flipping Real Housewife, and now Brendan had to see that, too, when he wanted to be making out with Jane Shaw, and things will never be normal between us again.
I’m running out of the conference center and across the street and into the lobby of our hotel, but really I’m running from Brendan and from the shambles I’ve made of everything—not only Brendan and me, but Jason and Emily and—
Tate.
I pull up short just asTate emerges from the elevator into the hotel lobby. He’s not dressed for the masquerade, just wearing a tight t-shirt and fashionably ripped jeans, and he’s got a duffel bag slung over his shoulder. Probably full of his stuff, since I’m guessing Emily kicked him out of her hotel room.
My anger flares again at seeing my cousin. Who Itrusted, and who hurt my friend.
“How could you?” I yell at him. I have lost all capacity for preamble. Did I ever have this to begin with?
Tate startles. “Su-Lin, hey, I—” He stops, looks me over, taking in the fancy dress and the blotchy face and ruined makeup. “You look like hell.”
I storm right over to him until I’m only a few feet away. “Well,youlook like a cheating asshole!”
Tate cringes and looks around. I’m obviously creating another scene—this seems to be what I’m doing tonight.
Whatever.
