TWELVE
KIJA
“You think they’ll put a reserved sign on this table for us? I feel like we’ve earned it by now,” I comment as Jase and I settle into the same booth where we always sit. We’ve been here at The Leafy Dragon a lot lately; the familiar food and general comfort is just too much to resist.
Jase slides in, stopping at a certain point on the seat. “I think this is actually my ass print? I just fit. Right here. Perfectly.”
I laugh because it seems likely enough and the owner, whose name I should really learn, looks up with an expression of “Again?” when he sees us.
“Should I try something new? I kinda wanna try something new,” Jase mutters, looking at the menu. I’m fairly certain he has done this every time we’ve been here since the very first visit so many years ago, and he has yet to do so.
“Go crazy,” I encourage him.
He doesn’t—ordering the same thing as always—but I deviate a little and get some naengmyeon and bibimbap. Not exactly adventurous, but a bit of a departure. I figure I have to take some things slow, and it might as well be my menu, because everything else in my life seems to be rapidly changing.
“Good morning with Nikko, huh?” I ask, teasing him because I can definitely see the hickey on his neck that he’s madea half-hearted attempt to cover.
“Yeah? It was pretty normal, though. He had to get up early for their schedule today,” Jase says, taking a sip of his soda after it gets placed in front of him.
Sun had told me they’d be busy, which is how I had known Jase would be boyfriend-free for a while. “And he decided to leave you with a little parting gift to make sure you didn’t miss him?”
It takes a second for him to realize what I mean and then his hand is flying up to his throat, trying to hide what I’ve obviously already seen. “Turns out he’s kind of a biter,” Jase admits, fighting a smirk. “It’s a recent discovery.”
“Fun for everyone,” I remark, stifling a laugh.
“So…” Jase begins, ready to change the subject as he starts twirling a chopstick package around on the table top. “You wanted to talk.”
I did say that, but now that I’m sitting here across from him, I almost regret mentioning it. I do, but I don’t. I know I have to make some decisions, but saying everything out loud makes it real in a way that I’m still struggling with. “We can’t even wait until the food gets here?”
He shakes his head. “Nope. Because then you’ll want to focus on eating and will continue to avoid whatever is making you nervous. I mean, I know it’s about,” he pauses to drop his voice, “Yung-Sun.”
There’s something in me that appreciates his discretion, even though there’s really no need for it here. No one is around, and the customers who frequent this place could likely not identify most of RYSING by their stage names, let alone their given names.
“Isn’t everything these days?” I ask. It’s not even a sarcastic question; it’s a statement of truth.
Jase smiles in that incredibly warm, friendly way he’s got that totally disarms people. “I love this for you, honestly.”
Despite the fact that the things I need to ask him make me anxious, I truly am thankful for Jase. I’ll always be grateful he somehow summoned the courage to hit on me in that bar on a random Thursday night and that we’re here now, about to have a conversation I would never have dreamed of back then.
“Yeah, I can tell you’re enjoying it as a spectator.” I need to make jokes to keep from freaking out. “I’m surprised you’re not jealous.”
He laughs, loudly. “It’s no secret that I’m not your type. No hard feelings.”
I can’t resist the segue. “Speaking of hard feelings…”
Jase nearly chokes as he takes a poorly-timed drink and slams the glass back down. “Are we talking about sex?” he asks in the least subtle whisper ever.
Dropping my head into my hands, I hiss, “Yes, Jase, we are talking about sex.”
“Oh!” He sounds legitimately surprised. “Is that what…”
Of course our food shows up then, the server glancing between us like he knows there’s something interesting going on here and wants to see what’s happening. I thank him with a nod and hope it doesn’t seem too rude. After he shuffles back to the kitchen, I take a bite of the first thing I can grab and shove it into my mouth to give myself a second to figure out how to start this conversation.
Jase is already peering across the table at me, like he’s trying to read my mind. “You’re thinking about… being with him.”
I nod, not meeting his eyes any longer than I have to. It’s not like we haven’t ever talked about sex before, but not like this. Not these things that I need to know and am a little afraid to ask. “Yes. I’m thinking about it. I can’t seem to think about anything else most of the time now.”
“Legit.” He slurps at his noodles, then says, “So, what do you need me for?”
