“It’s under control.”
I feel their stares burning into me as I gaze out at the forest and quietly sip my beer. I’m not here to play twenty-fucking-questions, I’m here to support my sister and the pack. Then I’m getting the fuck out of here and going back to my mate.
Fates, I never imagined feeling this way. I grew up watching my father, always learning from him about being Alpha. It was a role I was born to do, and even though it happened much sooner than anyone wanted, I’ve loved it. I’ve loved leading the pack, loved being a part of something bigger than me.
Until I didn’t.
Until the pressure of being the perfect leader slowly started to erode my sanity, pushing my wolf further toward madness and away from everyone else. Until I found Maya. After so many failed journeys, I really had accepted I just wasn’t meant to find her. That my wolf would take over and I’d need to be put down.
But now that I know where she is, the distance is clawing at me. Begging me to return. To claim her fully and never let her go. Even if it means leaving the only home I’ve ever had. Even if it means abandoning the pack.
I’m on edge as we sit at the table to eat moments later. My wolf is champing at the bit to get back to Maya, and my human side isn’t far behind him. But this matters too. My sister matters. And listening to Sofia talk me through the changes she has made—new patrol rotations, a mentorship system for younger warriors, how she has been handling the council—it all feels like it’s coming together. She’s doing great.
Warmth radiates from my chest as she talks. She had been helping so much over the past couple of years that it shouldn’t be a surprise, and in many ways, it’s not. But damn, it’s impressive how seamlessly she has settled into the role. I smile at her as pride lets me know I’ve left the pack in safe paws.
We don’t talk about the Keepers or how the operation to track down the customers is going. I know Jackson has visited Katie and Caleb, and I should be more interested in what’s happening, but they have it in hand. It doesn’t feel connected to me anymore. Sure, I took part in the rescue mission, but we got the omegas out. And tonight is a night of celebration. Of Sofia leading her first run. There will be time to support them again after my mate has accepted my claim.
“We doing this?” Sofia asks as our chatter dies off and anticipation buzzes around us.
Luca assures her that he’ll always be behind her, not that he needs to be. It was his idea in the first place for her to take over as Alpha. One I should have had myself. One I would have had if I weren’t so blinded by moon madness.
I strip off in the sitting room with Luca and Jackson before shifting into my wolf and heading outside to wait for Sofia and Emily. I shake out my fur and enjoy the smell of home in my wolf’s form. I haven’t had the chance to run as much as usual with being in the city, and I’ve missed this.
Sofia holds her head high when she emerges, and I fall in line behind her, Luca, and Emily, her luna.
I don’t need to assert myself. I never really had to. Always the top dog without having to earn it. It was in my blood and in my wolf.
Sofia leads us through the trees toward the lake, and the rest of the wolves join behind us. My fur bristles with the power coursing through the pack. Goddess, I’ve missed this sense of belonging and community, the connection to the land and the silver moon above.
Is it too much to believe I could have both?
Sofia turns, her eyes scanning over the wolves gathered behind her. Tension builds, and no one moves. Until finally, her wolf throws her head back and lets out a howl that breaks the silence of the night. She’s loud and ferocious and every bit the leader the pack needs.
I’m the first to return her howl, removing any doubt that I will follow my sister and that they should too. The thunderous roar of the wolves around me rises as Sofia sprints off into the woods.
Paws pound against the forest floor as wolves tear after her, racing and discharging the excess energy of the full moon. Many will couple up and fuck in the woods tonight, both mated couples as well as unmated adults. It’s the night we are closest to our wolves. Closest to our animal nature.
And I’m fucking wasting it.
I let out a yip before turning and racing back to the house.Shift damn it!My wolf is slow to hand the power back to me. He doesn’t want to be pushed down without running first.
We’re going to our mate, I plead, and that does it. He dips his head and defers the power to me. Shifting back to my human form, I hastily shove my legs into my pants and pull on my undershirtand boots. I grab my keys and race back to my car, leaving the pack behind.
I’ve done what I came to do. I showed up. I supported Sofia. Now I need to get back to my mate and find out if she feels the pull of the full moon the same way. If tonight is the night she finally lets her cat out to play.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Maya
The cool salt air of the coastal trail is invigorating, yet it does nothing to ground me. It does nothing to ease the tension that radiates through me. My muscles burn and my lungs scream, but it’s not enough to rid me of the adrenaline. It never is. Not when I get like this. When my sympathetic nervous system is activated and I’m filled with this endless energy and anticipatory buzzing feeling. Always on a full moon. Since I was a teenager. Since even before I found out what I am.
It’s lucky, really, that my masked man isn’t around tonight. How would I explain running a random marathon alone at night to the man I’m sleeping with?
And while I’m used to it in a way, tonight is different. Every step I take feels like I’m going in the wrong direction. It’s as if there’s a tug deep in my stomach, pulling me backward. It started light and easily ignored at first, but it’s been building to the point where it has become incessant and undeniable now.
Visions of the masked man and Ryan Rivera flash in my mind, joining together until I can no longer tell them apart. Images of my teeth sinking into his neck—visceral and filled with desire. The sharp taste in my mouth is like that first night I slept with themasked man. Fear skitters down my spine at the thoughts of what could happen if either one were here. I could hurt them.
I couldkillthem.
