Sophie swallowed and blew out her breath slowly. “I know. Phillip told me.”
“But did he tell you how bad it was?” Thea asked, a warning note in her tone.
Sophie narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, by the time I met Phillip, he hadn’t said a word in months,” Thea continued.
“How many months?” Sophie ventured, her heart pounding.
“Six,” Thea replied.
Sophie gasped. It felt as if someone had knocked the wind from her lungs. “Six?” she replied, her eyes filling with tears despite herself. She couldn’t help but think that all those months she’d believed he was dead, Phillip had been struggling to speak. It must have been excruciating for him. He hadn’t wanted her to see him like that, hadn’t wanted to hold her to their promised engagement if he could not speak ever again.
“Ewan was at his wits’ end,” Thea continued. “He had tried everything, including purchasing Alabaster.”
“When…when did Phillip begin to speak again?” Sophie ventured.
“I visited him every day for weeks,” Thea replied. “And it wasn’t until I mentioned Alabaster that he finally said something…the horse’s name.”
The tears that had filled Sophie’s eyes slowly slid down her cheeks. She didn’t want to know this. She didn’t want to hear this story. She dashed away the tears with both hands. “With all due respect, Thea. I’m uncertain what this has to do with my relationship with Phillip,” she said as she struggled to keep her breathing even.
Thea leaned forward and put her hands in her lap, watching Sophie’s face. “The fact is that Phillip was devastated after the war. He nearly died on that battlefield.”
Sophie nodded. “I know. Phillip never wanted to be a soldier, you know. He wanted to be a scholar. His father wouldn’t allow it.”
“I didn’t know that,” Thea said softly. “But it stands to reason. He’s a very kind man. One of the best I’ve ever known.”
“I was so worried about him,” Sophie continued, the memories sweeping her back to a time and place that she thought she’d buried in the past. “I prayed for him night and day…until my knees were scarred.”
“You loved him very much,” Thea said. “And he loved you. He told me about you…eventually, after he could speak again.”
A lump formed in Sophie’s throat. “He did?”
“Yes.” Thea nodded. “He showed me your letter.” Thea opened her reticule and pulled out a worn-looking folded piece of vellum. She offered it to Sophie.
Sophie’s heart pounded. Trepidation spiked through her belly. She stared at the letter as if it were a viper. “Wha…what is that?”
“It’s the letter Phillip wrote you from Devon. Lord Bellingham convinced him not to send it. It’s been hidden in his rooms there ever since.”
Sophie’s throat closed. She couldn’t breathe. She placed a hand at her throat. “Does he…know you have it?”
Thea shook her head. “No. But I daresay he would have wanted you to have it, eventually. Read it, Sophie. It’s lovely.”
Sophie forced herself to stand and step over to where Thea sat. Sophie’s own hand shook as she took the letter from Thea’s hand and walked swiftly over to the window where she unfolded it and read it through eyes blurred with tears.
My dearest S,
I write this letter with a hand that barely works, a ball hole in my shoulder, and several broken ribs. I hate that it has to be this way, but I want you to know that I am not dead. Please tell no one. I may not come back to you in one piece. I may not come back at all. I am in pieces at the moment. Not the whole man you deserve. But know that I always loved you and would have spent eternity loving you.
Forever,
P
Sophie lifted her head and stared unseeing out the window. “He told me he wrote me a letter. I didn’t believe him.”
“I understand,” Thea said quietly. “Believe me, I do. Being in love can be frightening. It can cause the best of us to do frankly stupid things. I rejected Ewan at least twice before I accepted him.”
Sophie frowned. “Why?”
