‘If you wanna act like a club slut, I’ll fucking sign you off as one.’
My hands tremble, and I clench them on my knees.
Then Wolf’s words slither through, and my chest gives a painful thud against my ribs.
‘I’ll become a good brother too. One day. Just need to keep us alive first…’
Alive. Will we be? Is that what’s going to happen?
“Please, Charlotte. I…”
I flinch slightly. My gaze drifting from him to the door of the bedroom.
‘You don’t ever step foot in my room again. You hear me?’
“Please, baby.”
‘Theo—p-please—’
My own voice from that night seeps in. Cracking the same way his is now.
I find myself nodding. And I’m drowning in the terrifying truth that I want to say his name. In case…
‘In case the time isn’t on our side.’
I open my mouth, staring at his gleaming, hopeful eyes that are still crawling with some remembered devastation.
Just once, Charlotte.
“Th—”
My throat closes, jaw snapping shut involuntarily.
“It’s okay,” he whispers. “You can say it. Just say my name. You know it. It’s Theo.”
His voice is wrecked. “Say it, baby. T-Theo.”
My lips won’t move. Not because I don’t want to. But because Ican’t. They’ve locked up like rusted steel.
His voice, from years ago, slams into me like a bat to the chest.‘Don’t you fucking dare say my name out of that mouth.’
My gaze lowers to his throat. And I feel the phantom pressure of his hands on mine.
It’s not real. Not now. But it doesn’t matter.
The memory tastes like blood in my mouth.
He shifts closer, eyes glistening. “Please, Charlotte,” he whispers, like it’ll undo all the damage. “Just once.”
I look up at him, aching to say his name. But I don’t say a thing. I can’t.
When the words finally come, they’re not the ones he wished for. But they split our world into two regardless. “I can’t,” I whimper, voice cracking. “You… you told me not to say your name out of this mouth.”
THIRTY-FIVE
Ruin
When we were fifteen, Dane and I stole our fathers’ rifles. Then I dug through the dumpster behind the clubhouse and scavenged two dozen empty beer bottles.
