Kairyn doesn’t look up as I approach. It’s hard not to stare. Even as children, my little brother was taller than me. As we grew, he stood above our father, even Kel. He’s always been broad of shoulder, but now? Now, he is colossal.
He must be seven feet tall at least, his black shirt and pants ripping at the seams. His tail lies limply beside him. A thatch of black hair falls over his eyes, and his tawny skin is streaked with dirt. I wonder how heavy it is, to hang his head so, with those massive horns growing from his skull. Do they hurt?
I don’t know what else to do, so I place the blankets beside me and sit back-to-back with him, only the bars between us.
A long silence follows before he murmurs, “You saved me. After everything.”
“Trust me, I’m as surprised as you.”
“Why?”
I stare at the ground in front of me. “I suppose…that’s just what a big brother does.”
He snorts. “I wouldn’t have saved me if I were you.”
There’s something about his voice. Without the tinny reverberation of his helm or the coursing rage in his words, it’s like I’m talking to someone I remember from a dream. I pause for a long moment. “Well, you’re not me.”
“I know,” he breathes. “A fact everyone has reminded me of my entire life.”
I don’t know how to respond, so I don’t. Another few minutes stretch out as we listen to each other’s breathing.
Finally, a sorrowful laugh escapes him. “You must feel so vindicated, to have me locked up in here. I don’t blame you. It wasn’t long ago I had you trapped in our dungeon.”
“You might not believe me, Kai, but I don’t enjoy seeing you in pain.”
“Again, I would if I were in your place.”
I knock the back of my helm against the metal rods. “How did we end up like this, brother? Rotating between two different sides of a cell?” I spin onto my knees, clutching the bars and staring at him. “Weren’t we friends once?”
Kairyn shakes his head, then turns to look at me. His eyes nearly send me shooting away from the bars. It’s like looking into two pools of lava. “We were brothers but never friends. No matter how hard I tried.”
“What do you mean?”
He squeezes his eyes shut. “Didn’t you see me? Everything I did to gain your notice? I followed and chased after you, all but screamed your name, but it didn’t matter. Father favored you.Always chose you as his second. Besides, you had Keldarion and the whole Winter Realm to explore. I was nothing but a burden.”
“No, I never saw you as a burden?—”
But hadn’t I? He was a nuisance to bring into council meetings, his ideas grandiose and impractical. In the training grounds, he was too easy an opponent. I preferred to spar with Father or, when visiting the other realms, Keldarion or one of the three Summer Princes. On the battlefield, Kairyn felt like a liability instead of an asset. Father and I had such chemistry fighting together, adding Kairyn into the mix was…
A burden.
Eventually, he took to spending much of his time with Mother. Despite all her duties as high princess, she was patient. Calm. Understanding.
And—accident or no—I had taken her away from him.
“I wasn’t there for you when you needed me,” I say quietly. “But even at my worst, I loved you, brother?—”
“No,” Kairyn mumbles and shift back from me. “No, you didn’t. As it became apparent I would never earn your love, I chose to make you hate me instead. Better that than to be invisible.”
I stay still, as if frozen by the chill.
Silence stretches between us.
Then there’s a metallic thud as my helm bangs against the bars. I slump forward. “Well, it didn’t work. I never hated you, Kai. Even when I should have. Even after everything you did, I could never hate you.”
Kairyn looks over his shoulder at me, the horns swinging near my helm. “I only wanted you to notice me.”
I give an exaggerated look down from his feet, then up to his horns. “Well, can’t miss you now.”
