His eyes graze my skin as goosebumps do the same. His meadow-colored eyes seem to take in every inch of me and I cross my arms across my chest, feeling self-conscious.
“You are beautiful.” His eyes move swiftly back to mine and he shuffles from foot to foot. “Forgive me. I'm saying a lot of things I shouldn't right now, it's probably the wine I had before we decided to start a wrestling match.”
I laugh, “So I'm not beautiful?”
He runs his hand through his hair, exhaling deeply, “Of course you are, I just ... should be controlling my mouth better thanI am tonight. I made your father a promise, to keep you safe and on the Goddess’ path. I need to go to sleep, as do you. We will have another day of traveling tomorrow before we reach the Doorway of Aka. Do you need me for anything?”
Well, that was a lot. What oath and path? Even if I ask, his loyalty would take priority and he would deny me answers to any questions I have.
“No, thank you. Let's get to sleep.” I quickly blow out the only candle in the tent and find myself on top of the furs pulling a thin blanket over me before he even moves. I don’t know why I blew out the candle so quickly, except for mindless nerves. He chuckles softly, probably at me and my scampering onto the pallet to get out of sight. I can hear the clink of his sword and armor that he places on the floor. Then the sounds of the threads of his trousers, before the soft rustling as he pulls them down. I ache to turn and look at him, but I know what a dangerous game that is. It's best to leave things alone.
I listen to him get onto his bedroll, his soft breaths filling the air, his scent of sage and sandalwood overwhelming me. I find myself remembering the fleeting moments we've shared over the past few weeks.
“Hey, Thy?”
I hear him roll over to face my bed, “Hmm?”
“The day we found out about all this, you called me ‘baby girl.’” I twist a piece of hair, the same one he tucked behind my ear earlier. “Do you remember the first time you called me that?”
“Yes, you were being a brat that day and I was being an ass. You couldn't have been more than what, eight lunar years, running around and following me everywhere that day, even though I didn't want you to.”
I laugh in the darkness as I remember, “You called me a ‘baby.’ I was so mad. I just wanted to hang out with you and you were so mean.”
It's then that his laughter comes crashing around me, and I hear him put his hand over his mouth to stifle the sound. “You kept telling me, 'I'm not a baby, I'm a big girl now.’ I think you even stomped your little foot, stumping your small toe in the process.”
“I did, and you told me to sit down and we would come to a resolution. You would just call me 'baby girl.' I haven't thought about that in a long time.” I smile, the air of the tent becoming even warmer now.
“I've thought about it and many other things over the years, but it's getting late and we need rest. Not all of us get to ride in a carriage all day. Goodnight,baby girl.”
“Good night.” I roll over and fall asleep to the memories of good days, days filled with sunshine, smiles, and a sweet boy who dealt with a stubborn girl.
eighteen
CARNAXA
The sun breaks through the fabric door of the tent and I rub the palms of my hands into my eyes trying to clear them. It takes me a moment to realize where I am, but I know it's not my home. The air smells different and it's then I look over to where Thylas slept the night before. He's gone already and I can't help but let out a small sigh and prayer, thankful he isn't here.
I sit up and pull the covers from me, letting my toes flex in the furs below the bed. Slipping off my night slip, I shift throughsome of the trunks at the end of my bed until I find a light orange halter dress to slip on. The shawl catches my eyes and I pull it out, running the soft fur through my fingers, before my eyes catch the present from Thylas. The small dagger feels heavy between my fingers as I pull it out. The sun catches the edge of the blade, and I love how beautiful it is. The stone shines brightly as I hold it up to the light. Maybe now would be a perfect time to keep it on me. I find a gold ribbon and wrap it around my upper thigh, patting it to make sure it's secure. Maybe I should ask Thylas for official lessons, he may have gifted it to me but I would love to know how to actually use it. I lean down to tie my sandals when I hear a shuffle outside the door.
“Naxa,” Thylas’ voice comes through the tent flap. “Are you dressed?”
I run my hands through my hair before tying it into a loose bun at the base of my skull, securing it with a ribbon. “Yes, come on in.”
He walks in, the sunlight creates a halo around him. A smile reaches from ear to ear. His hair is half up, the ends curling from the humidity of this place. Despite the circumstances, he seems to like being outside the boundaries of the castle and kingdom.
“Good morning. I've got the travel plans. We will make it to the Doorway of Aka today. After we go through, we will make camp for another night and arrive in Midaeliea the next morning. We will stay there briefly before finishing our travels.” He places a silver platter on the bed, full of ripe pears and apples. The cheese on the tray has my attention and I quickly grab a piece and let the taste flush over my taste buds.
He chuckles and shakes his head. “I grabbed extra cheese for you, and put some in your traveling pouch. I know how much you like it.” He smiles at me as he pours a glass of water for me, holding it out. “They didn't have your normal breakfast but they should have all of that in Midaeliea when we get there. I hope thecheese will make up for the lack of your favorite breakfast items today. ”
I take the glass from him and acknowledge his kindness with a, “Thank you.” Taking a sip of water I glance at the floor, unable to let the words Siphonie said last night leave me. “And in case I haven't said it, thank you for coming with me. I'm sure you would have loved to do anything else.”
I've never been good at speaking from the heart while looking directly at someone, I don’t mean to come off disrespectful; I struggle to find the words when I look someone in the eyes.
“That's not true, there is nowhere else I would rather be. I told you this the other night and I've told you this before. You have me until you wish me away. I'll always be here for you, Naxa. I'll be your safety.”
“I'll be your safety.”I can recall the night those words were first spoken, the phrase filtering through my head as the images replay themselves.
Four Lunar Years Ago
