I mentally wave goodbye to the bizarre, distant version of myself that got to meet Queen Ego, leaving her amongst the post-its and the strange, shadowy corners of Ransom.
‘Oh, Nora,’ I hear Owen call from behind me. ‘Don’t you want to put that post-it back?’
I freeze mid-step. I had completely forgotten it in my pocket, leaving myself no choice but to walk back around the boys. I feel a familiar cool gaze follow me as I make my way back to one of the corridors covered in notes, and slow when I hear steps behind me.
I don’t need to look to know who it is.
‘I’m sorry we didn’t win,’ he says quietly. I turn to take him in, his features lit under the peculiar, warm lights.
I smile bitterly, reaching for my post-it in my pocket. ‘That’s okay. I’m sorry you didn’t win either. For Max.’
‘Well, what he never knows won’t hurt him.’
I hum in agreement and politely wait for him to leave.
He stands patiently with his hands in his pockets. I lift my eyebrows and watch as his lip curls ever so slightly.
‘What are you doing?’ I deadpan.
‘Waiting for you to return the post-it so we can leave,’ he says mildly.
I clench my jaw. ‘I thought it was clear at this point that the post-it in question ismineand I would… prefer if you didn’t see it.’
‘Oh.’ He nods with a carefully concealed smile.
‘I’ll be two seconds, at least turn around or something.’
His eyes never leave mine, dark and curious. ‘Didn’t you say the song it related to was “Between You and Me”?’
I swear that the floor actually sways beneath me. He fucking heard me.Dammit.
I open my mouth to speak, and for a second nothing comes out.
‘I – uh… so?’
A groundbreaking response. That will potentially haunt me forever.
‘It’s rude to eavesdrop, by the way,’ I add with a glare.
He obviously doesn’t apologise; he just nods again and cracks a smile. What a weird reaction.
‘Alright, I’ll leave you to it.’
He leaves me standing with my post-it in hand, staring after him in bewilderment. I’m not sure why I’m so sad to be saying goodbye to him when all he does is send my brain into infinite, dizzying tailspins.
I slam it onto the wall, admiring the words I’d written just for me. Having it on display – so out in the open – means it doesn’t feel like so much like a wistful secret anymore. More of a wish hidden in plain sight.
The bittersweet truth that Firecrest is drawing to a close hits me, and Elliot and I’s farewell hangs over me more heavily than ever. I let myself enjoy the knowledge that the drumstick is in my possession for these last moments before we decide its fate.
As I make to leave, I give my post-it one last pensive glance. I feel my lips slope into a smile, letting the words harden and become something solid and true:
I want someone like him
38
Despite Josh’s protests, we make our way out of Ransom and step out of the strange door we entered what feels like hours ago. The sky has turned a darker shade of blue in our absence and is covered in dusty grey clouds, the air crisper and cooler.
Cherry Wave, the K-pop band that adorns Josh’s worn t-shirt and also sits sadly at the bottom of his checklist are playing on the Firecrest Stage shortly, just before the headliner act. He sweetly suggests that he would miss them, if there’s something else we’re all keen to see together.
