Charlie’s eyes went wide. “You almost hit a tree?”
Daniela waved them off. “Okay, let’s stop crowding the entryway and sit down. Alyssa’s tired!”
Abby ordered a drink for me, and Linda and Charlie walked me to the group sitting around the couches and tables by the fireplace that was stocked full of tacky little hand-carved wooden decorations, most of them with rainbow colors, glitter, pride flags. I found myself paying more attention than I expected, taking in all the little touches, just how… normal it was tohave a queer space. I’d always been self-conscious about my orientation, and even when I did tell my boyfriend… my ex-boyfriend about it, I ended up saying I was bisexual instead of that I was pansexual. Just becausepansexualfelt… unserious. Now that I was here, it felt silly to soften any of it.
I sat with the group and got whisked around in a whirlwind of introductions—Drew, the community event organizer at the Birdhouse and the pivot the whole community seemed to revolve around most days, was here and insisted on a hug, and he was definitely a hugger, squeezing me for a minute before he stepped back and gushed about how nice it was to meet Daniela’s friend. From the same reactions I was getting from all the other people there, it seemed like Daniela had been talking about me from the moment I’d saidmaybeabout coming to stay with her in Paxton Ridge. Nayla, who was a bit more serious and surly, sitting in the corner and greeting me with a cursory nod and ahey,and Kaitlyn, Skye, and Matt—my head was spinning with names and greetings by the time Daniela got back to join the group with her own drink in hand, Abby with one for her and one for me.
Still, as much as it might have been a little overwhelming, it was a fun group where nobody made a secret of the fact that I was welcome. Daniela must have told them I was touchy about the circumstances of why I was here, because nobody mentioned anything about the breakup or about Sawyer, or asked about how long I would be here, and as I had my drink and worked to keep up with the dozen conversations happening all at once, I found myself settling in, the heavy thoughts at the back of my mind floating away. I was feeling lighter and freer by the time I went back to the bar, and Linda came with me—just like Daniela had told me about, she mostly just suffered from a case of RBF and was actually a lot sweeter than her permanent scowl implied, just a little serious.
I stopped when she signed something at the bartender and he responded without a word, getting a bottle of wine from the cooler, and I looked at her and lowered my voice awkwardly.
“I’m not supposed to be ordering in sign language, am I?”
She laughed. “Kevin can hear. It’s just Cat’s influence.”
“Cat?”
Her expression tightened, and she tapped her card idly on the bar top. “Friend of ours.”
“Oh.” I needed to drop it. I couldn’t give into curiosity. “You don’t sound super friendly about her.” Dammit, I didn’t drop it. Linda shrugged.
“There was a big fight recently over some stupid things that didn’t need to be a big fight. Cat kind of stopped talking to anybody after that.”
Oh, god. Was everybody walking out over big fights right now? I should have been more tactful, but I’d never been good at keeping thoughts on the inside. “Is that the same fight that Jade was in?”
She gave me a quick look. “You know about Jade?”
“She’s, uh, the one who helped me when I almost hit the tree.”
She pursed her lips, turning back to Kevin behind the bar to pay for her wine, and she waited until she’d swirled it and taken a sip before she said, “Jade and Cat are friends. I think Jade’s mad about whatever it was, too, so she’s also stopped talking to people.”
“That sucks,” I said. “Do you know what people were fighting over?”
“Community organizing stuff. Like I said, things nobody needed to be arguing over. Cat’s sweet, but she doesn’t know when to let something go. She didn’t like something Drew was doing, and for some reason she and Jade decided to make a big, public ordeal out of it.”
I looked down. “Sorry that happened… it must suck being in the middle of that, feeling like you have to take sides.”
She shrugged harder this time, clearly frustrated. I needed to stop running my mouth. “It’s whatever. It’ll blow over at some point.” She pushed off from the bar, raising her glass to me. “Not something you need to worry about as a newbie.”
She headed back up towards the others, and I ordered my drink, leaning against the bar with my thoughts wandering as the bartender started on mine. He was just about finishing it up when the door jingled behind me, and I glanced back mostly to see if it was a face I recognized from any of Daniela’s photos coming into the building, and I got a nervous lump in my throat at the sight.A face I recognizedwas underselling it.
Jade, dressed a little nicer than she had been before, with a chunky sweater and her hair down, still had quite a mark on her cheek. She came into the building carrying a brown paper bag, and she stopped at the sight of me, both of us freezing up at the other.
“Oh—” I started, and she raised an eyebrow.
“They throw a party to welcome you, and they abandon you in the corner for it?”
“I was just ordering a drink,” I said, just as the bartender put my drink down. I held it up, like she wouldn’t have believed me otherwise. “See? Drink.” Why did I say that? Jesus.
She stared at me for a second before one corner of her mouth tugged in a smile. “Well, I can’t argue with the evidence,” she said.
“Yeah…” I cleared my throat, putting on a smile. “Good to see you. Um…”
“Don’t bother,” she sighed, a hand to her forehead, and I winced. “Judging from that look, I take it you’ve heard a thing or two about the dynamics. I’m not going to mess up your welcome party.”
“No, it’s fine. Really,” I said. “I don’t have issues with anyone or anything. I mean, you helped me out a ton earlier, I think you’re a good person.” Oh, god, I was talking too much again. “I’d be happy to have you here. I mean, we can be friends.”
She furrowed her brow. “I didn’t ask to be.”
