I knew Spencer was working on the video, but hopefully between my mention of it and his help, one of us would be able toactuallymake it happen.
Jax: HA. Don’t be naive, Avery.
Jax: Once something hits the internet, it’s on there forever.
Was this some kind of sick joke? The whole point of me paying him such an absurd amount of money was because he had been holding that video over my head every goddamn day for years now.
Pay the money. The video comes down.
That was the fucking deal.
Unable to control my emotions, my fingers latched onto the pillow closest to me. Throwing it across my van, it hit the back window, rattling the blinds.
Throwing a fit of anger wasn’t enough at this moment.
“Fucking asshole,” I mumbled under my breath. My fingers got to work, trying my hardest to reason with him.
Me: Jax, don’t be ridiculous. I worked my ass off and sent you every fucking dollar you requested.
Sure, I didn’t work for every dollar. But for about as long as I’ve lived here, I’d worked day in and day out to set aside that money for him. Of course, the payments started off slow as I was getting comfortable with this new life of mine. But once I’d found my rhythm, and had returning clients, it started to get easier for me to shut it all off and work more often to build up the amount of money I was desperate for. I’d done unthinkable things. Filthy things. Things I never would have seen myself doing years ago when I was in a committed relationship. Things that made my stomach churn until it became so numb that it didn’t matter anymore.
Me: I don’t understand why you’re doing this to me.
The anger subsided, now replaced with devastation.
My stomach tossed and turned like a washing machine, a wave of nausea running right through me.
Grabbing the small trash can I had stashed beside my bed, I emptied my stomach until there was nothing left but bile.
My phone dinged with his response. Instead of reading what I already knew was going to upset me more, I continued dry heaving until I felt like I could catch my breath.
But my phone didn’t just ding once. It alerted me with one text after the other.
Jax: Such a selfish girl, Avery. Expected my mom to raise you and spend her hard-earned money on you because Mommy and Daddy chose to hit the hard stuff instead of loving you.
Jax: Latched on to me because no one else ever showed you an ounce of attention.
Jax: Took every chance away from me to have a normal college experience.
The dinging wouldn’t stop.
Each response that filled my screen was worse than the one before.
How could he possibly think all those things?
Jax: You’re pathetic, Avery. You were only ever a live-in girlfriend. Someone to suck my dick and make me dinner.
Jax: I wanted you to fuck someone else in hopes that you’d want them more than me. I wanted a reason to get rid of you.
Jax: You made it so easy. You never told me not to film you and your mouth fucking watered at the idea of another dick. You gave me all the power I needed to ruin you.
Jax: The plan had always been to leave you with nothing, just like you came from.
After what felt like hours of being beaten down and kicked in the stomach repeatedly, I couldn’t think of a single thing I wanted to say to him.
When you were raised in a household with two parents who couldn’t give a shit, you learned to stay silent and move through the motions.
His words were cruel. Fucking awful. But that’s all they were—words.
