I smile, and though it’s shaky, it’s genuine. “I have a cell phone now. Do you want to…I don’t know, maybe keep in touch? Only if you want to, though?—”
“I’d love that. I’ll have to get my number from Will, though, because I still can’t remember it. Ooh, I have a game he put onthere for me. It’s a word game that you can play with friends. You should get that, and we can play together.”
“Okay, cool.” I grin, looking around. “We should find a book before Ambros gets worried and comes looking for us.”
“Is Ambros your boyfriend?”
“He’s my friend. I’m not sure I’m ready for a boyfriend or if I’ll ever be ready. The thought of—” I take a deep breath before continuing. “The thought of being intimate with anyone is terrifying.”
“You’ve only known the horrible side of sex. I promise you, though, that sex and intimacy with the right person is amazing. It’s nothing like what I thought it would be.”
“It doesn’t hurt?” I whisper.
She blinks back tears and shakes her head. “Will would cut off his own hands before he hurt me.”
I think about what she’s saying. I know from books and movies that sex has to be pleasurable, for some people at least, otherwise they wouldn’t keep having it.
“Do you like him? Ambros, I mean?”
“Yeah. I like him a lot. But he deserves better than to have to deal with all this.” I indicate myself.
“You don’t think he deserves a strong, kind, and brave woman?”
“Well, yeah, but?—”
“Good. Because that’s what you are, you know.”
“I don’t feel very brave,” I admit.
“That’s because the brave ones never do.” She gets to her feet and holds out her hand for me. I take it and let her help me up. “Okay, you choose for me, and I’ll choose a book for you, and once we’ve read them, we can discuss them. What do you think?”
“Like a mini book club?”
Her eyes widen before she claps. “I’ve never joined a club before. Yes. We’ll make our own book club. I’m so excited.”
And I can’t help but feel excited too, about the books, of course, but mostly because I made a friend.
* * *
We exchange numbers and books while talking over food and hot chocolate. I get to know Will and King a little more, too, but mostly my attention is focused on Six and hers on me.
By the time we pull up at the clubhouse later to collect Star, I’m wearing a huge smile and feel ten times lighter.
“Sorry, our date got hijacked,” Ambros says to me as he helps me off the bike and takes my helmet.
“I had a great time.”
“You did?”
“Yes. Thank you. I know we didn’t get to do date things, but we can have more dates, right?”
He leans closer, his hands moving to my hips. “Absofuckinglutely.”
I grin and lift on my tiptoes to peck his lips. It’s not enough, of course, the man is a giant compared to me. But he doesn’t make me work for it, dipping his head and grazing his lips over mine before pulling back.
“So fucking sweet.”
“It’s my lip gloss.”
