“I’ll see you over there then.” Without another word, I pluck Aggie off the bed and walk out the door.
The hotel Rod always stays at when he’s in town has an eclectic, artsy energy that I immediately love. Floral and gold wallpaper, vintage furniture, and bright colored plants and decor give the lobby a very Bohemian vibe. The concierge calls up to Rod’sroom to let him know I’ve arrived and escorts me to an updated birdcage elevator that has to be original to the building. I feel kind of fancy riding up to the top floor in the ornate metal box that looks exactly like…well, a birdcage.
Rod greets me at the door in a pair ofveryshort athletic shorts that cup his sizable bulge obscenely. He’s barefoot and shirtless, furry chest on full display. “Ah, you must be Riley!” he greets me enthusiastically. He has a hint of an accent I can’t place, but it’s definitely not Chicago. Luke has done all of the communicating, so it never occurred to me that Rod might not be from around here. “Nice to meet you, mate!”
“Yeah…you too,” I say slowly, taking his outstretched hand.
He laughs at my confusion and says, “My mum’s from Chicago, dad’s Australian. I grew up in the Windy City, but Dad’s accent’s quite strong, so here we are. Come on in, no need to hang around the hall all day!”
I like Rod immediately. The warm, authentic vibe I got from his photo definitely translates, and he has an easy affect about him that’s relaxing. Always a good thing when you’re about to do something as personal as fuck.
“Where’s Luke?” Rod asks, herding me over to the floral-patterned couch in the center of the suite. “I figured you’d both arrive together.” He waggles his eyebrows, taking a seat in the chair across from me. “The two of you are quite the talk in the Fanboy world right now, you know.”
I laugh nervously at that. It’s still strange to think of anyone being interested in my personal life. “He was running a little behind, but he should be here soon.”
“Right, right, no worries.” Rod bobs his head and rubs a hand over his scruffy blond jaw. Now that I look at him, I can totally picture him surfing at Torquay or working as a ranch hand in the Outback. He and Luke are going to look great fucking me together, and suddenly I actuallyamexcited for this collab. Afteronly a few minutes, I feel completely comfortable with him and confident that he was the right choice for a third. Hopefully, once Luke gets here and meets Rod, he’ll be excited too.
“So did you have any ideas for how you want this shoot to go?” I ask. I’m hoping that Luke wasn’t far behind me, but there’s honestly no telling what he’s going to do lately, so might as well get a jump on planning this thing out.
Rod frowns a little, brows meeting in obvious confusion. “The two of you didn’t talk about it at all?”
I squirm uncomfortably in my seat. So itisweird that Luke didn’t want to talk about this beforehand. I pull my lower lip between my teeth, considering my words carefully. “We, uh…didn’t really have the chance. My sister was visiting, and things have been a little hectic.”
“Oh, okay,” Rod says, accepting that explanation easily enough, making the lie feel even worse. “You had me worried for a second there may be trouble in paradise!”
Something sour unfurls in my gut and crawls through my veins, replacing all the good feelings I was having about this collab with a sick sense of dread. I’ve been in such a bubble with Luke the last few weeks…have I been overlooking how serious his lack of communication really is? Because now that Rod said it out loud, of course it would make sense for us, the actual couple in this scene, to have planned it out and talked about any boundaries we may have for the third. Will Luke be okay if I kiss Rod? Presumably he’s okay if Rod fucks me, because I assumed I’m the only one who would bottom in this little trio, but now I’m not so sure. Is it jealousy that’s been keeping him from talking to me about our work with other people?
Suddenly, there’s a heavy knock at the door, and Rod hops up to answer it. I should probably follow, but my entire body may as well have turned into a block of concrete, and I’m frozen in place. I hear Rod greeting Luke with a friendly back slap and a “Gladwe finally get a chance to do this, mate!” Luke’s reply is more cheerful than it was with me earlier, but there’s still a tension lining his tone that I don’t like.
Rod resumes his spot in the chair as Luke takes a seat on the sofa with me, but he won’t meet my eye. The easygoing energy that existed between Rod and me has evaporated completely with Luke’s arrival. He’s a storm cloud rolling in on a sunny day at the beach, dark and threatening. The few feet of distance feels like a canyon between us, and I have to swallow the urge to call this off right now.
“So,” Luke clears his throat, “did the two of you get started without me, then?”
My head whips around in shock. What on earth would make him think that? Does he really think I have no respect for him at all? This isn’t the Luke I thought I knew, and the fact that he’s coming in here guns blazing is only solidifying my jealousy theory. But he hasnothingto be jealous of. I’ve never given him any indication I want anyone but him. He’shereand we’re supposed to be doing this together, but this is suddenly starting to feel less like me and him versus the problem and more like me versus him. I didn’t agree to this fight, and I certainly don’t want to have it in front of a scene partner, but he isn’t giving me that choice.
“What thefuckwould make you think that?” My words are harsh, but my tone is scarily calm. I think if I let myself unleash the tidal wave of turmoil and fear and pain that’s been building inside of me these last few weeks, I’ll end up saying or doing something that I regret.
Luke gestures vaguely at Rod’s bare chest, a sarcastic smirk giving him a mean look that I don’t recognize.
Rod glances down at himself and then quickly back up at Luke, palms raised in surrender. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, no way, mate. This is just me. I never wear shirts. Hell, if I hadn’tknown you boys were coming over, I would’ve been naked. Ask housekeeping. They’ve gotten an eyeful of dong more than once.” He winces sheepishly.
Luke’s shoulders drop a little at that, and he finally peeks over at me out of the corner of his eye. I don’t realize I’m trembling until I hear it in my voice. “You really think that little of me?” I whisper.
If I weren’t so upset, I might feel something at the way Luke’s face crumples, and the man I love is suddenly in front of me once again, rather than whatever angry, untrusting version showed up here today. “Baby…” he says softly, reaching out to put his hand over mine on the seat.
“No.” I snatch my hand away, placing it in my lap. “You don’t get to come in here with an accusation like that and then call me baby.”
Rod clears his throat uncomfortably. “Um, I’ll give you two a minute alone,” he mumbles, standing up and disappearing into the bathroom, the door closing behind him.
I should be embarrassed at the scene we’re making in front of a stranger right now, but I can’t bring myself to care. I’m thinking back over every day since I met Luke, trying to figure out where this started and how I missed it. How did we get to the place we’ve been in for the last two weeks, and why did I think it was okay?
“I’m sorry,” Luke says finally, his voice thick with emotion. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. That wasn’t fair of me at all, and of course I don’t think that of you.” He scoots closer to me, tentatively sliding his hand across the cushion as a peace offering.
“That’s not enough, Luke.” My voice breaks a little on his name. Thoughts and memories are bombarding me rapid-fire now, and I’m overanalyzing every interaction we’ve had in the last two weeks. I shake my head and stand, turning away fromhim. I just need space. I need a minute to calm down and think rationally. This isn’t a crisis situation. It’s a misunderstanding. We’ve both been needing something the other hasn’t been providing, and we can figure that out and fix it. I just need to gather myself and put a pin in this for now. We can have a long talk about it after the shoot, but we’re here and we’re not going to hash this out in Rod’s hotel suite.
“I know. I know I’ve been a dick.” Luke’s presence is soft and meek at my back. He doesn’t seem to have realized how much this has all been bothering me until this moment. I need him to let me in, or I’m going to lose my mind. Turning to face him fully, I wrap my arms around him and allow myself to take comfort in his warm presence. I haven’t held him like this in the daylight in weeks, and it feels so damn good. He nuzzles into my hair and whispers, “I’m sorry, sunshine.”
Tilting my head back, I find his lips in a soft kiss. He lets out a little moan of surprise and opens to me, letting me sweep my tongue over his.
