This breakup was still a sore spot. I didn’t mean to snap. It was the first time they’ve asked about him. He’d come by recently and I left him outside. I couldn’t deal with the explanation. There was nothing to say.
I’ve been avoiding seeing anything about Rayzor on social media.
I didn’t handle that right with Erin and felt shitty for it.
I made breakfast for dinner to smooth things over with the kids since it’s their favorite.
We ate in silence. All of us in our own worlds. The kids played around in their food like it was the worst thing in the world. I didn’t even have a taste for it either.
“We want pizza,” Levi mumbled.
Erin’s eyes dragged from him to me.
I dropped my fork on the plate, leg shaking underneath the table. I was trying my hardest not to take it there with them again. This was hard.
“Y’all done?”
They nodded.
“Gon’ on then,” I dismissed them.
Erin took their plates, trashing what they didn’t eat before taking off to her room.
I sat at the table composing myself. My appetite was gone, so I pushed the plate back.
“This shit,” I murmured, getting up and tossing my own damn food in the trash.
They had gone and curled up in Erin’s room.
I sat on the couch for a second, stealing glances, hoping they’d come back out, but they didn’t. After pouring me some wine, I watched the blank TV screen alone. My thoughts were all over the place, but Rayzor was at the center of it all.
Why the hell he had to go and fuck things up? Now he’s thrown the kids into the lion’s den. I was lying to them and trying to mend my heart. I hated it.
After a couple glasses of wine, I made us popcorn and turned on their favorite movie cued up in my room so we could watchit from bed. I wanted peace in my house because my mind was a madhouse.
Before I made it the bedroom door, the doorbell rang. I didn’t even have time to check my phone before the kids came sprinting passed me, almost knocking me over.
I felt him in my spine. He was near.
“That bet not be–” I chased them down.
“Rayzor!” the kids yelled.
“I know damn well y’all didn’t…” My words trailed off when I saw him walking in with pizza boxes and bags full of groceries.
Hoodie over his feet, sweats and slides on. Comfortable like he’d been either home or at the gym. Not his usual wear.
“So, y’all don’t listen now? I told y’all he wasn’t coming.”
“But, Ma, it’s pizza night,” Levi said chipperly.
“That’s why y’all played in the food I cooked,” I argued. “Hell no, y’all ain’t eating this either. Get it out my house.” I pointed to the door.
The disappointed looks on their faces didn’t move me. They deliberately defied me and that exceeds anything from earlier. I couldn’t believe they did me like that.
“Eris, come on. He’s already here,” Erin whined.
“I said no. I cooked, y’all didn’t eat.”
