“And look where not speaking about it got me. Nick! We’re talking about Casey, for fuck’s sake! The one you threw your whole career away for! Do you need me to refresh your memory?”
“No, I didn’t. I didn’t give up anything.”
“You gave her up,” Ian says. “You gave up everything.”
I slump down onto the bonnet of Dad’s car, my knees giving way. I know that these two are right about one thing: Ididgive up everything. But I did it for one reason, the most important reason of my life.
I did it for her.
And I’m ready to do it again.
60
Nick
Ifinally head back into the garden, followed by my brothers.
“Where did you get to?” Casey asks, biting into her burger.
“We were just looking for something in the garage,” I respond evasively, avoiding her gaze.
“Is everything okay? You seem weird.”
“It’s nothing. Everything’s fine.”
“You’re annoyed about my T-shirt, aren’t you?”
I look at her and smile instinctively at the writing on her top. It reads:I’m with stupid, complete with an arrow that happens to be pointing to me. No T-shirt has ever been more spot-on.
“I love your top,” I tell her, pulling her in close to me. “I love all your tops.”
“Just my tops?”
“And what’s underneath them.”
Casey smiles.
“Is there any food left for me, or have you eaten all the enamel off the plates, too?”
“Your mum saved you some.”
“Thank God!”
“But if you don’t hurry up…”
“Wow, someone’s hungry today.”
“That’s your fault. You burned off too many of my calories last night.”
“At least I’m keeping you in shape.”
“I’m fine as I am. You should think about your arse cheeks, O’Connor, just in case you need them for something.”
I know that she’s joking, but I can’t help but think about the hint of fear cowering behind her words.
“Nick, would you mind holding Jamie for a minute?” Riley approaches us. “I have to run upstairs, and everyone else is too busy eating or drinking.”
“Sure,” I say, taking Jamie from her arms and holding her tightly against my chest. “Come to your handsome uncle.” I rock her back and forward in my arms, completely under her spell. This little girl is capable of repairing anything: even a torn-up, battered old heart like mine.
