Now I'm the one who isdefinitelyfrowning. "I'm notpunishinganyone. They hurt me?—"
"Jamie didn't."
If I could stand without my ankle hurting, I would in a flash as anger rips through me. "What the hell is your thing with Jamie? I told you I'm hurting, and he's the only one you seem worried about."
Silence is all I get for about five seconds. In that time, my heart continues to beat rapidly and my anxiety skyrockets. Why is she so focused onmyboyfriend?Is he still my boyfriend? Do I want him to be?
"I'm sorry," Cassidy murmurs, sounding much less concerned.
I'm still riled though. "Are you texting each other trying to figure out how to get me to let shit go? Maybe comforting each other because I'm not talking? What's going on with you and my boyfriend, Cassidy?"
That answers that question.I guess I still think of Jamie and mine.
"No! My God, no Violet. And it's not Jamie I'm worried about, it'syou. I sent him Blue's address after he proved he was innocent, and he texted me when he found out you were safe because he knew how scared I was."
Guilt steals the wind from my jealous sails. I only texted Cassidy yesterday, so she would have been left questioning my safety fordayshad Jamie not given her the peace of mind she needed to sleep at night.
"I'm sorry," I whisper, tears already dripping from my chin.
Cassidy is quick to put me at ease. "It's okay. This is what I'm worried about, though. You've been working so hard on your self-growth and you know...emotional intelligence?—"
"Offensive, but I'll take it," I grumble between sniffles.
Cassidy laughs. "I'm not wrong. Seriously, Jamie is good for you, Violet. No, you don't need him, but he's goodtoyou and you deserve someone who fights for your happiness."
"Damn it, Cass." Sighing, I wipe my tears and spin my phone around in a circle on the coffee table. She's on speakerphone.
"So many curse words," she teases. "You and Blue must be hanging out a lot, huh?"
Thankful for the change in topic, I roll with it. "We have been," I confirm and decide to be vulnerable with my friend. If I can't tell my bestie about my nightmares, then I have some serious work to do. "She's woken up a few times to my nightmares and stays with me when I ask her to. I honestly feel like a child again when we had to share a room in Linda's trailer. Blue was always my protector."
Cassidy's silent, and I can't help but want one of her unsolicited hugs. I miss her.
"I'm glad I'm here with Mom, but do you think—" I hesitate, swallowing thickly. Why is it so hard to ask for help? "Can you come stay with me here for a few days? Or even just a day? I'm not ready to leave, but I miss you, and I could really use a big ass bottle of vodka."
Cassidy giggles while I suck in a deep breath after my rambling. "I'll be there tomorrow. Don't worry."
"Really?" I'm surprised, which, now that I'm thinking about it, is kind of sad. If the roles were reversed, I would drop everything to help Cassidy through her heartbreak and recovery after an accident.
"Of course. I already had it worked out with Blue to come stay until the end of the week. I was going to ask during our call, but you beat me to it."
I'm thankful I don't burst into tears once again, but I do hang my head and say a heartfelt thank you to my roommate, who has become someone I truly could not live without. It ate at me not talking to her for a day and a half, but I needed some space from my life. I needed to think and come back to my senses.
I'm now feeling incredibly selfish for allowing her to worry. This might be the wake-up call I need to think beyond the ache in my heart.
Three days is enough time to stitch a broken heart back together, right? I just need a few things. "Bring vodka and your laptop. I want to create aglow-upPinterest board together."
"HELL YES!" Cassidy screeches, drawing a smile out of me. "I'll bring crackers, meat, and cheese too. Oh, and taco dip. Think your family would like my fun brownies? Well, I'll just make a triple batch just in case."
Felix, who I didn't realize was walking through the living room, stops and grins at me. "I look forward to trying thesefunbrownies, Cassidy. Drive safe, kiddo!"
"Yes, sir!" she shouts through the speaker.
I'm not sure what the future holds, but I'm pretty excited about the next few days at least. And that seems like pretty good progress from the depressive hole I've found myself in.
Twelve
JAMIE
