“Of course, it makes sense!” Destiny said in an overly sweet voice. “You’re saving the human race.”
Angry words bubbled up in on my throat, but I swallowed them down and focused on Ivy. “I hope it works out for you.”
She gave me a shy smile, then returned to her food.
“Ginger,” Destiny said, moving on to the next woman. “You’re up!”
The tattooed blonde’s bored expression matched her tone when she said. “Ginger. Twenty-seven years old. I’ve been in this bullshit program for thirteen months. Not knocked up yet, and I hope to God I never am.” She held Destiny’s gaze as she wrapped her knuckles on the end table at her side. “Knock on wood.”
Destiny sighed and, without saying anything, focused on Bette, her expression less enthusiastic but still hopeful when she said, “Bette?”
The pregnant woman at my side gave me a bright smile. “I’m Bette, and I’m twenty-four. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant pretty much since we got together four years ago but found out last year that he can’t.” She looked down, smiling as she ran her hand over her stomach. “Thanks to the program, I was able to conceive on my third try, and I can’t wait to meet my little guy.”
“And we are so happy for you,” Destiny said, beaming.
Bette looked up, blinking at the tears that had filled her eyes. “Thank you.”
The two stared at one another like this was some cheesy romance and they’d just met the person of theirdreams. On the other side of the room, Malika rolled her eyes and Ginger muttered something I couldn’t hear. Ivy was too focused on eating to notice, while Lilly seemed to have zoned out.
When Bette finally looked away, Destiny shifted her focus to me. “Which brings us to our new addition. Why don’t you tell us a little bit about yourself, Ara?”
As if I had a choice.
“Yeah,” I began, then cleared my throat. “I just turned twenty-six on May twenty-second, and I had my first insemination yesterday.”
“How exciting!” Destiny chirped. “And how are you feeling about it?”
Was she serious?
I looked around, took in the eye rolls and set jaws that told me everyone – with the possible exception of Bette – found her as irritating as I did. Ginger especially seemed to have a difficult time keeping her feelings to herself, and while I had just as much of a desire to lay into Destiny and tell her exactly how I felt, I wasn’t sure if it would be the right move. This support group was supposed to exist so we could talk about how we felt, but everything about it so far said that wasn’t true. Would pushing the group leader’s buttons be a bad idea? Would it come back to bite me in the ass?
“Ara?” Destiny prompted when I said nothing.
Despite my doubts, I decided to feel her out. “I’m torn.”
“How so?” she asked, clearly eager to have a willing participant.
“Part of me wants it to work so I can just get the whole thing over with, but the other part…” Again, I hesitated. “The other part hopes the whole thing is a failure.”
Destiny blinked as if she hadn’t expected the statement, and I didn’t miss the uncomfortable way Lilly shifted.
“And why do you feel that way?” Destiny asked in a stiff tone.
“Because I didn’t choose this,” I replied matter-of-factly.
“And you don’t think saving the human race is important?” she shot back, clearly agitated.
“Why should it be up to me? Why is itmyresponsibility tosave the human race?” I responded, waving around the room. “Why is it any of our responsibilities?”
“Because we’re the fertile ones.” Destiny mimicked me by gesturing to the women around her. “We’re lucky. You have to know that.”
I thought about it, then said, “I can agree with that. We’re lucky. Sure. Most of the population is infertile, which makes us among the lucky few. But no one should be forced to procreate if they don’t want to. We should have a choice.”
“You have choices,” Destiny replied. “You can choose to opt out or you can keep the baby. No one is forcing you to be a mother if that isn’t what you want.”
“But you’re forcing me to have a baby.”
Destiny said nothing, although the ice in her expression left little doubt what she was thinking. No one else said anything either, and the longer the silence stretched on, the more it became obvious that every person in the room agreed with me except Destiny. Even Bette, I now knew. She sat close to me, her back straight and her head held high, her focus on the group leader as she waited for a response.
