Just as the bitter thought went through my head, my wristband dinged. It was eight o’clock. Time for my evening temperature check. Of course, the reminder of my imprisonment would come right now.
My eyes were still squeezed shut when another sound filled the silence. It was different than the first chime, but not the same as the one from the other night when I’d been around secondhand smoke. I lifted my left arm, my wrist turned toward my face. I kept my eyes closed for a moment, dreading what I was going to see, but knowing what it would be. Knowing that my life was about to change again.
When I opened my eyes, I scanned the small rectangular face, my insides tightening even more at the sight of the word flashing across the screen.
FERTILE. FERTILE. FERTILE.
I had twenty-four hours to report to the Department of Fertility.
Holy shit.
Fourteen
My salad forgotten, I headed to my bedroom, typing a quick text to my boss as I walked.
I WON’T BE IN TOMORROW. SORRY.
It was short but since she was aware of what was going on, I didn’t need to explain.
After I hit send, I stripped my clothes off and slid into bed, my fingers already flying across the screen as I typed a text to Trevor.
TOMORROW’S THE DAY. DON’T ASK HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW. PART OF ME IS RELIEVED TO JUST GET IT OVER WITH BUT ANOTHER PART WANTS THE WORLD TO IMPLODE SO I DON’T HAVE TO DEAL WITH ANY OF IT. UGH. I HATE THIS.
I settled in, staring at my phone as I waited for a response. He was usually pretty fast, but when the minutes ticked by and the message still hadn’t changed to read, I remembered thattonight was his date with Owen. Shit. I shouldn’t burden Trevor with my baggage when he was on a date. It wasn’t fair.
Quickly, I typed a new text.
I’M AN ASS. I FORGOT ABOUT YOUR DATE. HAVE FUN SO YOU CAN CHEER ME UP WITH ALL THE DETAILS TOMORROW. LOVE YOU.
I hit send and tossed my phone on the bed, then closed my eyes.
I expected sleep to elude me, but to my shock, I not only drifted off easily, but I also didn’t dream. It was a relief even if I didn’t exactly wake the next morning feeling rested. And it couldn’t push away my dread at what I had to do.
In a moment of stupidity, I’d tossed my phone on the bed the night before instead of plugging it in, and it was dead when I woke. Seeing the black screen gave me a moment of panic since I relied on my phone to wake me for work. Then I remembered that I wasn’t going in today and had until eight o’clock tonight to report to the Department of Fertility and relaxed. Only a little, of course.
I plugged my phone in while I showered, doing my best not to think about what awaited me, and by the time I was out and dry and dressed, it was at least on, allowing me to see not only the time but the texts I’d missed the night before. One from my boss saying she understood, two from Trevor, the first telling me not to worry and the second asking if I was okay. There was a third from a number I didn’t have saved in my phone but could immediately tell was from Hilary.
JUST GOT THE NEWS. AMAZING! I’LL SEE YOU TOMORROW!!!
I wasn’t sure if she sent it because she was genuinely excited or if it was a not-so-subtle reminder of my contractual obligation, but either way, I wished she’d left me the fuck alone.
It was a little after nine, late if I’d been heading to work but still early since I had nothing to do but go to the Department of Fertility and put my feet in stirrups. Desperately, I wished I could hit a café, grab a latte and muffin, and scroll social media while I sipped my coffee. Although, after last night, I doubted that would go well. I wasn’t exactly in the mood to be in the public eye.
I took my time getting ready, blow drying my long brown hair then curling it, which was something I never did. For no reason other than that I wanted to put off the inevitable as long as possible, I did my makeup, even going so far as to line my green eyes and put on lipstick. Once I was finished, I stood back and studied my reflection. I looked like a caricature of myself or like I was dressing up for the people at the clinic, and that was the last thing I wanted to do, so I washed it off. When my face was once again clean of makeup, I raked my still damp fingers through my hair and pulled it into a ponytail. The result was much more me, which was what I needed right now. To feel likeme.
Not until I stepped outside did I realized how overcast and chilly the day was. I pulled my weather app up as I walked, so I could check the temperature and forecast. It was only sixty-four degrees, and although the high would be around seventy-eight, there was a significant chance of rain. Good. After getting a stranger’s sperm inserted into my body, watching a thunderstorm roll through town from the comfort of my living room seemed fitting.
Unlike my first trip to the Department of Fertility, I didn’t drag my feet. I walked briskly, like I was late for an appointment, my head held high as I worked to focus on anything but where I was going. I studied the freshly bloomed flowers in the various landscaped areas around town, the people I passed, and even the buildings. Nothing escaped my notice, and with my attention on my surroundings, I was able to relax a little. Not a lot, but enough that I wasn’t nearly as tense as I’d expected when I reached my destination.
I barely thought about the security procedures as I showed my ID and answered the same questions as the other times I’d been here, and only briefly registered that the same womanI’d met on my first visit was at the desk. I returned her smile absentmindedly, took my driver’s license when she handed it back to me, then proceeded to the elevator.
The same Department of Fertility soldier stood beside it.
“Good morning,” he said, offering me a warm smile.
“Good for who?” I muttered as I jammed my finger against the button.
Undeterred by my mood, his grin stretched wider, deepening the dimple in his left cheek. “I’m having a good day.”
