Still nothing. Fine. Fuck, okay, so it’s not fine, but what am I supposed to do?
Exhaustion was pressing into my bones. This last week was catching up to me in a big way, too little sleep, too much work, and the emotional whiplash of going from being at the lake house with her, talking about our golden future together, to this.
She wasn’t going to let me in, though. That much had become clear, so I headed back to my apartment, grabbed a notepad, and scribbled a message on the paper.
I’m going to fix this. Whatever it takes, we’ll figure it out.
I have to go meet with Alex now, but please talk to me when I get back.
I love you.
I didn’t know if that last bit would help or make it worse, but it was the truth. Quickly folding the little piece of paper in half, I slid it under her door, making sure it disappeared into the dim light on the other side like it was being swallowed whole. At least that way, I knew it wasn’t about to be snatched up by one of the building’s cleaning staff, thinking it was trash.
After another minute of just standing there, staring, with my heart in my shoes, I forced myself to leave and headed upstairs to Alex’s penthouse. We lived in the same building, but we rarely spent time together here. Actually, we rarely spent time together at all.
That needs to change.
Life was flying past and he was going to be a dad soon. I wanted to be a good uncle to that kid. An involved uncle.
First, you might want to sort out your shit with your wife.I sighed. The elevator ride felt longer than usual as my very helpful brain replayed that fight in miserable, looping detail.Who would you have chosen?
I still didn’t know how to answer that question in a way that wouldn’t hurt her. She was both women, for God’s sake. On the other hand, she was already hurt and nothing could be furtherfrom the truth than what she thought right now, so maybe I just had to go ahead and be honest.
Either way, I shelved the whole thing when I got to Alex’s door, giving a quick, firm knock. He opened seconds later, arching an eyebrow as his gaze swept across my face. “You look like hell. Even worse than me, and that’s saying something.”
“Gee, I wonder why.”
He stepped aside and waved me in. “What happened?”
I didn’t ease into it. I didn’t have the energy for that right now, so I came right out with it. “I think I know how the story leaked.”
He straightened slightly. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. First things first though, I’m not having an affair, Alex. I need you to know that. I did cheat on Emma, but I wasn’t cheating on Kate. It turned out that I wasn’t cheating at all, actually.” I rubbed a hand along a tense muscle in one of my shoulders. “Honestly, I don’t know how to explain this, but Emma isn’t… separate.”
Alex stared at me with both of his eyebrows arched now, kind of looking like he was about to offer me a ride to psychiatric hospital too. “I don’t follow. Is this some kind of athrouple? Because I don’t think Hinds would understand a relationship with three people in it.”
I took a breath. “No it’s nothing like that. EmmaisKate.”
Alex blinked rapidly. “What are you talking about?”
“Five years ago, I met a woman on the internet.Emma. We started talking, became friends, and things kind of snowballed from there. It all came to a head when Hinds put that condition on the deal.”
He leaned back against the counter. “So when you said Emma is Kate?”
I shrugged. “Emma’s real name isn’t Emma. It’s Kate, and Kate is Kate Vanderhaul.”
“How is that even?—”
“I don’t know,” I said. “It just is. It’s a small world apparently.”
I gave him the condensed version. The Discord. The park. The realization. Everything that had come after.
Alex listened without interrupting, but when I finished, he just shook his head slowly. “I can’t even begin to unpack that.”
“Join the club.”
“But the leak?”
