I follow, heart hammering. I don’t know where to begin. How do you break someone’s heart? I sit down next to her and I take her chilled hands in mine. I hold her wary gaze, feeling sick.
“Kara, I—” I swallow hard. “Shit, I… I don’t know how to do this without hurting you.”
She pulls her hands from mine, her face pale. “Just say it. Just say whatever it is you need to say.”
I close my eyes and when I open them, her eyes glitter with tears. But she doesn’t look sad so much as angry. I open my mouth to speak, but then close it again. I can’t seem to find the words.
“You’re breaking up with me.” Her voice is flat.
I let out a breath. “Kara, I really care about you—”
“No,” she hisses. “Don’t give me the speech. I don’t need the fucking speech, Liam. I want to know why. Why are you breaking up with me? You said you were happy. Iaskedyou if you were happy and you said you were.”
“I know.” I grimace. “But I’m not happy and it’s not fair to you that I keep pretending I am.”
“Why did you lie?”
“I don’t know. I… I wanted to be happy with you.” I go to touch her arm but she moves away. “I do love you, it’s just not in the way you deserve.”
Her face is pinched. “Don’t pretend this is for me. You want out, that’s all.”
“Kara, we haven’t been getting along that great lately. You know it and I know it. Would you really want to marry me?”
Yes. I love you.” Her bottom lip trembles.
“Even though things haven’t been great between us lately?”
Her eyes go cold. “We were getting along beautifully untilhecame into our life.” My face warms and she narrows her eyes. “Oh, my God. You’re blushing. I’m right, aren’t I?Jude isthe reason you’re dumping me.” She stands, looking like she wants to throw something.
“Kara—”
“I knew it,” she shouts, her face quivering. “I fucking knew that asshole was going to come between us.” She presses a hand to her chest. “I could feel it. I could feel him weaseling his way into your heart.”
“It really was just friendship. At first.”
“Bullshit. He went after you and he got you.”
I frown. “You want this to be about Jude, but it’s about us. I don’t love you the way I should, Kara. I can’t marry you knowing that. Why would you even want me to?”
“We were so happy before he came here.” She starts to cry. “We were so in love and everything was so good.”
My heart aches watching her unravel. I want to hold her to comfort her, but I know she’ll just shove me away. “Honey, yes, things were good, but the fact that I kept stalling about moving in together or proposing shows something was missing.”
“You would have proposed, if he hadn’t come into your life.” She cries harder, glaring at me. “You loved me.”
“I don’t think I would have proposed.” I hang my head. “I think I’d have stalled until you gave up on me. Like all the other women I dated did.”
“You bastard.” Her voice cracks.
“I’m so sorry, Kara. I didn’t know. I didn’t know this part of myself until Jude came here.” I study her feeling like a jerk. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“Well you did,” she snaps, wiping roughly at her eyes.
I slump. “I’m sorry,” I repeat yet again.
“So you’re actually saying that you’re suddenly into guys? Just like that?”
“Not guys,” I say hoarsely. “Just Jude.”
