“I, uh…” Great. Everything that she had prepared, the entire speech that she had rehearsed in her bedroom over and over the night before, all of it poofed out of her mind the moment she opened her mouth.
“Is everything okay?”
There was genuine concern in Kieran’s tone as he stepped closer, pulling one hand out of his pocket as though he could steady her. Sammie was pretty sure, though, that if he did touch her right now she would burst into actual flames.
Waseverything okay? Sammie hoped it would be. She was scared, terrified even, because what if she put herself out there again, only to find herself left behind once more? Just like how Cassie had left her.
I’m sorry, Sammie. I can’t do the whole friends thing now. It hurts too much.
She hadn’t talked to Cassie in months. A year and a half of secret touches and whispered promises, a best friend who became so much more.
Sammie knew the breakup had been right for both of them. But losing a friend, too? She hadn’t been ready for that.
What if that happened again?
“Everything’s fine,” she said, her fingers beginning to ache from how hard she was gripping them. “I just want to tell you something.”
The boy, bless his heart (as her grandma would say), definitely wasn’t catching on. It would all be so much easier if he could justunderstandwhat Sammie was trying to say without her actually having tosayit. Kieran cocked his head to the side, a slight movement that sent a few stray curls falling across one cheekbone. The urge to reach out and push them back, to uncover those pretty eyes that were locked on her had Sammie’s stomach swooping something fierce.
“I know you’re leaving soon,” she began slowly, tugging something out of her back pocket, holding it out to Kieran. “I wanted to give you this, for luck.”
A small frame rested in her hands, one she had dug out of an old box of her grandma’s things that she’d found in the attic. It was made for wallet size pictures, but Sammie had pulled out the faded stock photo, replacing it with a plain black piece of paper. A four leaf clover rested in the middle of the frame.
Kieran laughed, taking the gift from her. Their fingers brushed and sparks lit Sammie up, her whole body tingling in the aftermath.
“I love it,” he said. His smile was so bright.
“You don’t think it’s dumb?” Sammie had agonized over what to give him, needing something that he could take with him to remind him of home.
To remind him of her.
“I mean,” he began, flashing a cheeky grin that brought heat to Sammie’s face. “It’s a little on the nose, luck of the Irish and all that. But it’s perfect.” A pause as he carefully tucked the gift into his messenger bag. “Thanks, Sammie.”
Another pause, Kieran leaning close to tug her into a side hug that felt far too friendship-like. Half of her plan had worked, but it was the next part that had kept Sammie up late the previous night.
“That’s not all,” she continued, pulling out of the awkward hug. Distant thunder rang out, a breeze picking up, settling off the tree leaves around them like gentle wind chimes. “I also wanted to tell you something.”
Kieran stared at her, his sweet smile fading as he furrowed his brow in innocent confusion.
This was it. Sammie would just throw it out there and hope for the best.
“I like you,” she blurted. Her skin felt too hot, too tight, the sensation growing as Kieran’s eyes widened with surprise.
Sammie figured it was best to just barrel on.
“I like you a lot,” she said. “And I have for a long time. I know you’re leaving, I know the timing is terrible, but I couldn’t let you go without telling you. And it’s not like we’ll never see each other again! You’ll be back to see your family for holidays and stuff. So I just thought that maybe…”
Kieran wasn’t saying anything. He wasn’t smiling. Stray raindrops landed on Sammie’s skin as she searched his face for anything, any sign that this conversation was going the way she hoped it would.
“I just thought that maybe we could-”
“Sammie, I-”
They both cut off, and Sammie felt the first trickle of dread drip down her spine.
“You first.” She regretted the words immediately. Kieran wrapped a hand around the strap of his bag, knuckles white as he squeezed it.
“Sammie.” He was looking at the ground and not at her. Not looking at her, because he was about to say something she wouldn’t like. More raindrops began to pelt them, and Sammie hoped they would hide the moisture building in her eyes.
