“One day,” she vows on my behalf, and I haul myself up.
The sun is beginning to rise, and I need a few hours’ sleep before I set off back to the hospital.
As I take a quick shower, all I feel is the pull to be back with Elsa-Marie and Amelia.
Slamming my fist against the tiled wall, I force out the memory of the sadness coating her as I rejected her.
There can never be a day she hears how much I love her. It was confusing enough for her to understand why we can’t be together, it would be a hell of a lot worse if she knew my true feelings.
Mr. Haynes follows behind as I drive Amelia and Elsa-Marie home from the hospital. Amelia sits in the back with the baby, and I flick my eyes to the rearview mirror every now and then and every time all I see is the glow around them both. I will protect them both the only way I know, even if it kills me.
“What’s your gate code?”
“5-3-2-1-6-9.”
I tap them in and the gates slowly open and I think back to the night I picked them up at the club and she’d rather climb out and do it herself then tell me Clare’s code.
Out front of the house, Catherine steps out before we’ve come to a stop and claps her hands excitedly as I get out and open the back door. Mr. Haynes collects the bags and the bunch of balloons. Amelia left the flowers on the receptionist’s desk to brighten their day.
I deal with the car seat while Amelia scoots out the other side. Inside, I come to a stop when a rainbow of pink and white balloons take up the far side of the living room. Glittery pink star confetti hangs from the arch and pink roses are placed in vases all around the room.
“Wow,” Amelia murmurs.
“I couldn’t help myself. I see this sort of thing all over Instagram and splashed out.”
“What do you know about Instagram, Catherine?” Amelia giggles.
So this is how rich people bring their babies home. I can’t say I’d have thought to do this but I’m glad Catherine did judging by the look of joy on Amelia’s face.
“I love it, Catherine. Thank you.”
“Where should I set Elsa-Marie down?” I ask.
“By the couch.”
I set our daughter down and it all hits home. Shit is about to get real and fuck me if I’m not looking forward to it.
It feels like I’ve not shut my eyes five minutes ago when my phone rings dragging me from a heavy sleep.
It’s just gone two in the morning and Amelia’s name flashes on the screen. I hit answer and sit up.
Her cries hit my ear first and I’m instantly wide awake.
“What’s wrong?”
“She won’t stop crying, she won’t feed, I think she needs to see a doctor.”
My heart fucking pounds away as I’m already dressing while trying to keep the phone to my ear.
“What do you mean, a doctor? Is she sick?”
“I don’t know, that’s why I’m calling you.”
“Where’s your dad?”
“He went out for different diapers, she kept coming out in a rash with the others.”
“How long has he been gone?”
