“W…what are you doing here, Knoxx?”
“That’s all your stupid ass has to say. At one point I couldn’t get you to leave me alone, now you think you’re a fucking ghost.”
“Knoxx. I ju?—”
“Get the fuck in the car, RaeAnn.” She knew I was serious because I called her by her first name.
She did exactly what she was told, so I closed the door behind her and went around to the driver side. Once I eased into my seat, I just looked at her. She was for sure pregnant. I couldsee it in the pudginess that she had all around her usually slim physique. She refused to look at me.
“Were you going to tell me?”
Silence.
“Were you going to fucking tell me?” Her silence enraged me.
The raising of my voice made her jump. “No, because you didn’t want me.”
“Right. I didn’t want you, but I want my fucking child RaeAnn. You and the child we created are not a fucking package deal.” I sent a mug in her direction.
She shook her head. “No, but we should be.”
I sat back and laughed at the stupid shit coming out of her mouth. “Tell me something. The first one, was it why you disappeared?”
She looked surprised. Apparently, Ms. Clark hadn’t told her that she disclosed that as well. “Yeah and no. I love you, but we weren’t ready. We wer?—”
“And you are now? Bullshit. Everything you do is to spite and or hurt me because I won’t be what you want.”
“That is not tru?—”
“Then why did you get rid of a baby that you knew I would’ve wanted? Better fucking question, why didn’t you try to get rid of this one?”
She looked at me for a while like she didn’t know what to say. I could see it all in Rae’s face that she knew that everything I’d just said to her was the truth and she really didn’t have an answer to my question.
“Is this why you came here? To make me feel like shit? Every decision I make isn’t about you, Knoxx. Believe it or not I am capable of leaving you alone and finding better for me and my child.”
“I don’t give a fuck about you finding better for yourself, but if shorty in there is mine, then I am better. I’m the fucking pappy.”
“I ‘m getting over you. Slowly, but it?—”
“You say that but not only did you abort my seed, but you’re also carrying one that you weren’t going to tell me about just because I didn’t want to be with you.”
“I’m selfish. I own that.”
“At some point you have to own a little more than that, Rae. But it’s a start. I want to be in my seed’s life.”
She nodded. “For sure, I shouldn’t have tried to hide it from you.”
I stared ahead.
“Now can I go back to work and we can pick this up later?”
I glanced in her direction and nodded my head. I knew this was far from over and this little diplomatic act of hers was just a front to get me away from her job, but for now I had my fill of Rae. It’s funny that after she left me I realized how much I tolerated her shit, because I was used to her. Now, that was fucked up, because if this was my kid that she was carrying I was surely stuck dealing with her for the next eighteen years.
After I watched her walk back into her office, I pulled off. I needed to talk to somebody about this shit.
“So, you believe her?” Ommy asked. The expression on her face housed her skepticism.
I had already explained to her everything that took place with Rae. Now she was giving me that skeptical look. She didn't believe Rae was pregnant or even by me. Low key. I understood where she was coming from because Rae Had really fucked up.Imagine waking up one morning after thinking everything is fine to an empty bed and a letter saying she couldn't do it anymore. That's exactly what shorty put me through and my sister witnessed first-hand how that affected me. So I understood why Ommy didn't believe a damn thing when it came to Rae. Shit, she was mad at me when she found out that after everything, I was still fucking Ray. She didn't get it. She thought that I was probably getting back together with her, but that would never happen. Rae fucked up and there was no taking anything that she had done back. However the idea of us having a child together weighed heavily on my mind.
