“Crow can draw it for me.” Stone isn’t going to let the idea go. “I can’t wait to see what he does with that.”
Justice frowns. “Wait. I’m sixteen. Can I get a tattoo now?”
“Wait and go with your brother when he’s old enough, Crow won’t tattoo anyone under eighteen,” Rita advises, sounding hopeful, but also resigned.
“Mom! I’ll be freaking eighty before he’s eighteen.”
“Good math, Justice,” Stone says dryly, then he rushes on to his next thought. It would be pretty fun to be twelve again, living in a house like this. “If you’re part of the family, can I tell you that I’ve always thought you give awesome vampire vibes? You have to come to the Halloween parties with me next year. You’d scare the heck out of everyone.”
“Stone, I swear…” Rita goes bright red. “I’m so sorry, Shadow.”
“I didn’t mean it that way,” Stone starts looking contrite. “I just meant you’re a big scary mother—”
“Stone!”
“It’s okay,” I say. And it is. It’s really okay. This joking and banter, friendly teasing. This is what life is about. This is what’s been missing. Fawnie squeezes my hand. She’s the first to smile at me. It’s beautiful and encouraging. A smile I want to look at for the rest of my life. “I’d love to get out of my head. I never laughed enough. This is nice.”
“It’s horrifying,” Rita protests.
“I’m enjoying myself.”
“Are you going to get a tattoo?” Justice asks.
“I plan on it. I’d love to see an artist who could cover up some of the scars.”
Stone isn’t going to be outdone by his brother in the brutally hilarious honesty department. “Don’t hide them all. They’re cool. Makes you look like a superhero.”
“Thanks, Stone.”
Preacher nearly dies. Rita looks like she wants to crawl under the table.
“My friends don’t know who you are, but when they meet you, they’ll think you’re super badass,” Stone goes on, oblivious to his parents’ distress. “I think you’re badass. You saved Fawnie’s life. And her cat too. You could havedied. I would never have been brave enough to do that. Everyone should know that you’re the best.”
“Maybe not everyone. Maybe just a few people to start,” Fawnie cautions, but her lips twitch.
I want to kiss that little movement. I want to devour her whole mouth. I want to cry, I want to laugh, I want to sit down at the piano and play quietly for hours, then go for a noisy, roaring ride on my bike. I’ve been so careful about feeling nothing. I just wish I knew how exhausting and how hardthatwould be. And how it wasn’t fucking worth itat all.
“Right. But I have the coolest big stepbrother-in-law-club-uncle ever.”
“Oh,” Fawnie gasps.
Preacher grunts. Rita slides down in her chair another inch.
“You could call me Finn again if you want,” I offer, proud of myself for not choking on my own saliva. “That’s a little much. And Shadow is… more for club stuff.”
“Shadow is cool.” Stone gives me two thumbs up. “Finn is cool too, but I knew you were hurting back then. It’s like you got a second chance. New name, new life.”
I’m not going to cry. Not now. Not now. Not now.
Fawnie brushes at her eyes, and fuck. I have to spread my hand over the bridge my nose and spear my fingers into mine as well.
“Thanks, bud,” I choke.
“Food’s getting cold,” Rita urges.
That’s all the encouragement the boys need to dig back in. To them, Fawnie and I are a done deal. Maybe they assumed we always were something special ever since they found out that it was me who saved her and the fire was why I eventually came here. It’s sweet, given that their early childhood wasn’t great.They’ve known a fair amount of trauma in their lives, thanks to their biological father. That they can so easily accept me and be happy for me, happy andloving, blows my mind. They’re not little kids anymore, like they were when I first met them. They’ve grown into wonderful people. They’re going to be good men.
Rita and Preacher will make sure of it.
