What I gave Xan wasn’t curated. The Prophet’s brainwashing bled into me running through the forest, then standing on that table at The Rooster—knowing it was fake, wishing it wasn’t. Matt’s triumphant gaze as he dragged Brit and me through tunnels. One memory crashing into the next, until Xan was riding a roller coaster of my entire life.
The sound of squeaking wheels and stomping hooves slowly became louder than my thoughts. A second set of knees brushed my opposite side, and a large hand rested on my back. I’d just dumped everything onto Xan.
‘I wanted to know. You deserve to have someone at your side who understands, and I want to be that person more than anything.’
I took a deep breath. Cayden’s vanilla and cinnamon scent filled my nose.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.’Tentatively, as if unsure it was okay, Xan’s emotions brushed mine, imprinting their truth into me.‘I’m sorry I didn’t come to you the moment you woke. I will do better.’
“I’m sorry, too,” I said into Cayden’s shirt.
I clung to Cayden until my tears dried. The wheels turned, and the horse's hooves clopped as I processed. My world splintered like glass, but Everly’s soft voice, mid-story, cut through.
Slowly, I sat up and rubbed my face before stretching my back, which Rowan promptly rubbed, sitting on the edge of the cart above me. I hadn’t noticed he had abandoned his horse to join us. The dim rays of the evening light barely filtered through the gray sky. The dark stone of Edinburgh had given way to brown crops and knotted trees.
I reached up and squeezed Rowan's knee in thanks as my back slowly relaxed, as much as it could in the bumpy wagon.
“Good nap?” Everly asked, pausing her story.
I hadn’t been asleep, but I felt lighter and more rested than I had in days.
An almost content purr rumbled to me from Xan’s mind, making my cheeks tingle. Instead of commenting on it, I focused on my friend, sitting across from us at Xan’s feet.
“Yeah, I needed that,” I smiled at Everly.
She reached out and squeezed my hand. “Anyway, I loved that dress.” Everly smiled faintly. “Amanda did too. I thought I had a good childhood, until the contracts started, until my dad showed me what people outside our family were worth. Amanda was my shadow, always laughing, stealing sweets, sneaking out of lessons. And then one day… she was just gone.” Her hands clenched together. “One action destroyed everything.”
“I’m sure—” I started to reassure my friend.
Everly cut me off with a wave. “Collars are bad shit.” She bit her lips together. “I don’t want to go back to my family. I have three contracts, and that’s only to start. Two of them I’ve never even met. I know it’s a poor comparison, but sometimes I don’t feel different from the people my family collars.”
The freedoms of my time hit me hard. None of that existed here. “A slave to biology and the bleak state the human race is in.” I took a deep breath. “I’ll do whatever I can, Everly. I don’t know what that is, but you deserve to be happy.”
‘We’ll do what we can, Quinn, all of us. Everly deserves a life of her choosing.’
Warmth filled my stomach at Xan’s words.
A tear filled Everly’s eye, and she brushed it away. “Anyway, I'm supposed to be teaching, not whatever this is.” She opened her pocket-void and pulled a metal collar out of it. “My dad made me put one of these in my void, just in case I needed it. I didn’t want him to be right.”
I barked out an inappropriate laugh. “You and my dad both.”
Everly’s shy smile flickered as she held out the collar. Despite the subject, I hung on every word—how she imprinted on the metal, then wove magic through the layers meant to capture and control. The negative parts of a tethered. The three spots on my back ached.
The sun set behind the gray clouds without a shred of color. Although we could only occasionally make it out, the almost full moon gave us and the horses enough light to plod forward. Cayden’s home loomed in front of us, growing ever closer.
It was now or never. I lay down next to Xan and laced our fingers together. I didn’t want to watch, so I closed my eyes. The moment Xan slipped out of my mind to put the collar on me, Alex took control of my thoughts. My brain became a slideshow of my possible futures, all centered around Alex being a part of my life.
‘You want this, Quinn,’Alex insisted.
‘Even if I do, I don’t want it from you,’I responded.
Alex chuckled, ‘Name of your next big hit.’
The absurdity cracked me. I laughed because this wasn’t Miss Q; this was someone hijacking my life. I laughed because I didn’t know what else to do.
I stopped laughing. “Please. Get him out.”
The collar clicked into place, and Alex vanished.
