It’s a shame that Luke Hastings doesn’t want me anymore. As my hurt continues through every emotional state I’ve ever felt, my hurt turns to anger.
At hour ninety-six, I’m furious as I get ready for the gala.
Furious that Luke could toss me aside so easily, without a word or an explanation.
Furious at myself for being so reckless and giving my heart to a man who clearly didn’t want it.
And angry that whenever I look around, he’s always there, taunting me. At work, in the paddock, and even on the posters around town promoting the race weekend.
Even my dreams are haunted by him. I can’t escape him anywhere, and it’s exhausting.
I finish getting ready, feeling beautiful after days in cozy clothes and no makeup. I meet up with the rest of the Star News team who are attending the Gala. It’s me, Molly, Steve, Andrew, and Anne.
It feels good to go with the team, knowing I have someone to lean on this evening. I’m sure as hell going to need it.
Chapter 29
LUKE
I’m standing off to the side of the room with Lily when several heads turn toward the entrance. I curse under my breath, looking at the woman of my dreams, who was mine just a few days ago before I messed everything up.
Jessica draws the attention of every man in the room, and I see several of the eligible bachelors wrapping up their conversations, probably eager to be the first to ask her to dance.
She’s wearing a beautiful gown, and when I realize we match, I’m reminded how fucking stupid I’ve been all over again. Her hair is curled and hanging off one shoulder, and she looks breathtaking.
“She chose that dress with you in mind, you idiot. And I even made sure you had a matching tuxedo! So much for that effort.” Lily scoffs next to me, and it’s probably the hundredth time she’s called me an idiot over the past few days.
Along with Robert, they’ve all decided that I’m a useless man who doesn’t deserve someone like Jessica anyway.
I haven’t told them the real reason I ended things with her, fearing Lily might tell Jessica. I don’t want Jessica to sacrifice anything for me, so it’s better that no one knows the truth, even if it makes me seem like an even bigger asshole.
Lily goes to greet Jessica, and I turn to the bartender, asking for the strongest shot of alcohol he has.
I never drink during the season, only the occasional champagne at the podium, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
I down the shot just as Peter Centimo walks up to Jessica, and I feel like I’m going to be sick all over again.
All week, I’ve been feeling physically ill; I’ve even been performing worse in the gym, unable to push myself the way I usually do.
I feel drained of all my energy, even though I only eat, sleep, and train.
I meet with my agent and the team, but it all feels like a state of limbo, where I’m walking around like a zombie.
When Jessica smiles at Peter and accepts his hand for a dance, I see red.
I know I have no claim on her, but seeing her take his hand, a man I can’t stand, sends raging jealousy through my bones.
Just as I’m about to go over there, Sebastian stops me with a hand on my chest.
“Not so fast there, lover boy. You look like you’re going to murder someone.”
I push against him. Sebastian arrived in Australia yesterday, and I’m grateful to have him by my side.
“Yeah, I might as well do that, maybe it will make me feel something other than absolute shit,” I tell him, and he gently steps in front of me.
Sebastian knows why I broke it off, and even though he also thinks I’m a stupid idiot, he understands why I also want to protect her.
“Dude, hitting him would only push her further away, and even if you can’t be with her the way you want, maybe you’ll eventually have something like a friendship. That opportunity flies out the window if you do something like that.”
