“Just a couple of minutes ago, you were practically marrying me off to Sam,” I pointed out. “He and I have been friends for years.”
“Online friends,” Tanner emphasized. “I want to be supportive here, but I’m not going to pretend like I don’t have concerns. Have you truly thought this through?”
“Yes, Tanner. It’s all I’ve been doing,” I shot back, a bit louder than I would have liked. “You’re here taking care of Nana, everyone else is off doing their own thing, and I’ve been sitting around an empty apartment like a sad sack. It made me realize that I’m too dependent on everyone.”
“I have a social life because other people make the plans. If I try to call anyone to go out when they haven’t reached out first, they’re all busy,” I pointed out. It sounded a lot like whining, but I was so damn tired of feeling this way. “I only feel like the real me when we go to the clubs, and that’s because I’ve got you there to make sure no one does something stupid. If you’re not home, I’m lost. I need to get out of this rut.”
“And you think moving away is going to do that for you?” His tone was even, and I knew he was working hard to stay as neutral as possible.
“I do,” I confirmed. “Besides, if you and Ryan stay together, chances are you’ll be out that way eventually, too. So, I’m just ahead of the game. And by jumping out of the nest now, maybe I won’t be so codependent by the time you quit hiding at Nana’s house.”
“I’m not hiding,” Tanner protested.
He totally was. This thing with him and Ryan scared the shit out of him. They’d had a huge misunderstanding years ago and, as much as he wanted to believe they were more than a holiday fling now, it was hard when they lived so far apart.
But that was more shit I only knew because of thin walls. Right before Nana got hurt, I heard them arguing because Ryan wanted Tanner to move and Tanner didn’t want to rush things. It was the right decision at first, but now, I had a feeling he was using Nana’s injury to his advantage.
“You are, but I think I understand it. At some point, you have to take a leap of faith, too. He’s got roots out there now.”
“And I have obligations here.” He shook his head and glared at me. “We’re not talking about me right now. I’m not sure about this, but I know I’m not going to be able to stop you. Where did you say they live again?”
“The name of the city is Annandale. You’d love it there.” I didn’t have to feign excitement now. The first thing I noticed when I was there was how accepting they were of all types. I didn’t get one dirty look, not even the day I tentatively walked down the street wearing a cute little schoolgirl outfit. Really, that was the day my mind kept going back to. “Sam manages a bar there and his partner is a school principal, so he’s probably had to pass all sorts of background checks. Sam said he could get me a job where he works, but I’m not sure about that. We’ll have to see.”
When I finally took a breath and turned to look at Tanner, his mouth was hanging open. Even in the faint light as the sun set, I could see how pale his skin had gone. He rubbed a hand over his mouth and shook his head. “You havegotto be shitting me.”
“Uh, no. Why?” Now I was confused.
“It’s definitely a small world,” Tanner mused. Nana poked her head out the door and asked if we planned on sitting out in the cold all night. Tanner pushed off the hood and grabbed the bakery box. “We’re not done talking about this, but I feel a bit better now.”
“Are you going to explain why you’re being so cryptic and just did an about-face when you thought I was being reckless just a minute ago?”
I followed Tanner across the lawn, pausing to look up at the house that held so many memories of our childhood together. My own grandparents lived just a few doors down until grandma passed and grandpa had to go to the nursing home. The two couples were good friends. That was how I met Tanner. As much as I was looking forward to a fresh start, coming here reminded me that there were good memories I was leaving behind, too.
“Not the time, but I’ll give you three guesses where Ryan lives now.” Tanner chuckled when my mouth dropped open, much the same way his had. “Yeah, my thoughts exactly. Now, come on before Nana tries to start cooking for us.”
The last of my anxiety faded away as I spent the evening with Tanner and Nana. We broke the news to her that I was moving, and she said it was about damn time I got away from the small-minded bigots in this town. It felt like a sign, and by the time I said goodnight, I felt a lot better about my decision.
2
John
I could hear the rest of the staff on the other side of the club, laughing and carrying on. Jack had invited me to the unveiling of the new logo and a hint of what was to come as The Back Deck evolved into DeSires, but I wasn’t in a people mood.
It seemed I was never up for being around people anymore, which really sucked when your job involved non-stop contact with them. That’s why I loved this week-long reprieve. Most of the work was being done by professional contractors, but Jack had taken pity on me and given me some grunt work to keep a paycheck coming in.
As a bonus, I was learning that demolition was a great stress reliever.
I’d like to say I didn’t know what had changed that turned my entire personality sour, but that’d be a damned lie. No matter how much I tried to forget, I could pinpoint the exact moment when everything I thought I knew about life was tipped over and spilled all over the ground.
I was forty-three fucking years old—well past the age of self-discovery—and yet, all it took was one coy smile from the person I’d incorrectly assumed was a pretty young woman at Sam's graduation party. Even once I realized my mistake, there was something about Maverick that couldn't be ignored.
He’d cowered when I first introduced myself, as if waiting for me to hurl an insult—or worse—at him. Slowly but surely, he’d opened up to me, and it didn’t take long before he had me wrapped around his dainty finger. I'd thrown caution to the wind and given him a private tour of the side of the club most people didn’t get to see.
It felt like I was under his spell—unable to refuse when he gracefully dropped to his knees in one of the private rooms he’d insisted on exploring. I panicked as I felt my dick growing hard when he tugged on the zipper of my jeans, but I didn’t stop him. I couldn’t, not with the way he fluttered his eyelashes as he licked his lips. And I'd come faster and harder than I cared to admit with those pretty pink lips wrapped around my cock.
That was the beginning of the end for me. I wasn't ready to admit how much I wanted to re-create how alive I'd felt that night, and being surrounded by my bosses and their adorable, loving partners felt like a dagger in my chest. They had what I wanted, but as far as everyone knew, I was the token straight guy at the club. So, I did what came naturally to me, and I withdrew as much as possible without risking my job.
“Get your ass out here,” Jack demanded. I had been focusing all my energy on tearing out a dated partial wall with lattice at the top, so I hadn’t heard him come in. I wiped the sweat from my brow, unaware until that point how hard I’d been working. Sweat dripped down my face and the back of my shirt was soaked. And yet, even that wouldn’t be enough to get him to turn around and leave me here to stew in my own confusion. “You were as much a part of this project as any of the rest of us, and we’re not going to celebrate until you put down your mallet.”
