“Maybe you’re a cougar now.”Derek grins.“How old is Avery?”
“Thirty-five.”She most certainly didn’t make me feel like a cougar.
“I’m not one to judge, darling.Ben is fourteen years younger than me.What’s a few more years?”
“She’s such a top,” I say, because Derek lives for details like this.“She completely overwhelmed me.In the best way possible.”
“If circumstances were different,” Derek asks.“Would you want to sleep with her again?”
“Hell, yeah.”I’m dying to find out what Avery’s like with a strap-on.In fact, even the notion makes me squirm in my seat.“Honestly, I might even fall for her.”Not that I would ever expect that to be mutual.
“But you can never see her again?”
“Not for two years, at least.”I lean my head back.“It was so good, Derek.So unexpected.So… healing for me after Lois.It’s a hard thing to let go of, because she made me feel so alive.She’s such a delight.But, let’s be honest, the only reason she even slept with me is because I’m her therapist.She would never have noticed me otherwise.I am self-aware enough to realize that.”
“You can’t know that.”Derek paints on his warmest smile.“As your best friend, I can attest to how big a delight you are as well.”
“Still, it was wrong.There really are no two ways about it.”
“I’m here for you.Whatever you need.”
“You can’t tell anyone.This needs to remain a secret.”
“That goes without saying.”I’m not sure exactly how much Derek and Ben share.He might tell his husband, but my trust in Derek extends to his spouse.
Derek heaves a sigh.“Do you know what you’re going to do?”
“I know what I have to do.”
“Sleep on it, Nic.For more than one night.And call me when you’ve made a decision.You don’t have to go through this alone.”
“Thanks.”
“And don’t forget to look on the bright side.”His smile is still warm and even a little comforting.“At least you felt something.”
I nod.
“Avery fucking Hall,” Derek says, shaking his head.“For a minute there, I thought Ida and Faye had plans to take her home.”
“If only they had,” I say, wistfully.“And I hadn’t drunk all the champagne.”
“At the very least, at our age, we still know how to party.”
“And what a party it was.”I sip from my water.
“And afterparty,” Derek says, because he’s always good for a joke.
Chapter17
Avery
I’m getting ready for the LA premiere ofDeadline for Love, although I don’t have much to do at all.The studio has sent over a ‘glam squad’ to do my hair and makeup, complete with a stylist to actually dress me.
The contrast with the premiere forQueer Girl Summercan’t be greater—then, I was allowed to dress myself, even to comb my own hair.
The stylist is a sweet guy named Jaz who correctly interprets my eye roll at the rack of dresses he brought.
“You might prefer a suit?”he whispers.
