Kim: Russell is probably ecstatic that you let him give youcare.
Ryan: I understand. It’s just different for me to accept care. It’s hard to take a beating, cry, quiver, jerk off in front of him and then be wipeddown.
Kim: You’ve cravedintimacy.
April: Does it matter where it comes from as long as it’sgenuine?
Ryan: I want something real. He makes me want things. Like, I want to be around him because he says good things tome.
I love when he says, “Good, Ryan.” Or when he touchesme.
Could I admit that to the girlsthough?
Kim: What about the physicalthings?
I took a deep breath and begantyping.
Ryan: I like being touched by hands that are as kind as his. No one has touched me likethat.
My knee bounced nervously as I tried to quickly put into words a few things for thegirls.
Ryan: I want to run something by you, but I don’t really have a grasp on ityet.
April: Go forit.
Ryan: I’m finding that I like making him happy too. Like when I make him happy for jerking off slower. No one has ever taken the time like he has withme.
Kim: He’s a wonderfulmentor.
A mentor. But, we’re friends too. He said so. Unless—unless I was just an apprentice and occasional bottom. Just a bottom for the purposes ofeducation.