“You’re a real narcissist, you know that?” She’s grinning like she has been all night and I’ll never get used to that real unbridled smile. I catch her hand as she hits me and feel engulfed by her wide eyes.
“I have never been more jealous than I was watching you rob these men blind the past two rounds.” I see her throat bob as she nervously licks her lips and I can’t look away as I stare at them. It takes everything in my power not to kiss her right here in front of the entire student body. We’ve definitely gotten a few glances tonight, but Olivia seems to not give it a second thought, and after hearing the rumor circulating about Will and the coat check girl, my conscience hasn’t taken a single hit. She moves closer to me, now standing on her tiptoes.
“Fine,” she whispers, then gently pushes me away before striding to the divorcees. I signal the bartender for another beer as I watch her approach them, unable to tear my eyes away from her, even for a second.
She really is a natural. I’ve never seen someone more charming or who could so easily get the eyes and ears of everyone in a crowd. It took almost everything in my power to not tear off the limbs of each man she got a donation from in the past hour. To their benefit, they were both in their early seventies, but the way she let their eyes glide up her body— my fist clenches around my beer at the thought and I take a long drink.
Her schmoozing seems to be working as the divorcees scan the room for who I assume is me. Olivia gives me the ‘signal’ we’ve been using all night when it’s time to move into the next phase of our plan. I feel myself smirk, watching her pull at her ear, her eyes wide as if to say“Can you hurry the hell up?”I push off the bar standing to my full height and begin making myway toward the group. It's obvious a few of the women notice me, their faces flushed and eyes wide, sizing me up as if I’m their prey. I move my eyes back to Olivia’s though, and her smile beams. Her eyes, the dress she’s wearing, hugging her in all the right places, make it impossible to acknowledge anyone else as I finally get to the group.
“Hey.” My eyes are trained directly on her, not even glancing toward any of the other women. Her gaze shifts uncomfortably, glancing at the other women who want my attention, a flush creeping up her neck.
“You must be Benjamin. Olivia here has been telling us so much about you,” a fifty something blonde woman says to my right. Her voice is low, the seductive tone forced.
“In the flesh,” I respond. My eyes don’t leave Olivia’s which causes her to turn a brighter shade of red, the blonde woman letting out a lowhmphat my snub.
“We’d love to hear more about the basketball team’s endeavors this year. We hear you are quite the star,” a dark haired woman with a slight European accent says somewhere on my far left. I barely hear her as I lick my lips absorbing the way Olivia’s hair is glistening in the light of the chandelier, her earrings grazing the nape of her neck. I meet her eyes and Olivia silently urges me with her gaze to follow through with our plan.
I sigh, finally giving the group the most charming grin I can muster. “Sorry ladies, I’m just not myself today.” I give them a sort of manly version of pouting, causing Olivia to cover her smile with her hand. “I think I might be in a sort of unrequited love situation…” I put a hand on my heart and hear a few of the women sigh, one audiblyawww-ing, while the blonde from before squeezes my bicep.
“Oh sweetie, tell us all about it.” I glance at Olivia, giving her a conspiratorial look as she rolls her eyes trying to suppress a grin, her face completely pink.
“You see, my dream girl— she’s with another man.” The blonde gasps, squeezing my bicep tighter which causes me to inwardly cringe.
The European woman moves closer, her hand cupping my face. “But who could be more handsome than you?” Her slight accent adds to the dramatics of the interaction which causes Olivia to give a low giggle and the snarkier women of the group give her a dirty look in return.
“Alright ladies, I think his ego has had enough for one day,” Olivia says, squeezing between myself and the blonde woman, causing her arm which was previously squeezing my bicep to fall to her side. They all look very frustrated by Olivia’s interruption and I can’t help but be amused by the bombshell beside me, seemingly jealous of a few divorcees. “Please make your checks out to the Astor Hill Alumni Foundation,” she calls over her shoulder while pushing me forward, back toward the bar. I grab her hand, leading her to one of the outdoor terraces.
It’s October, and the northeastern air has cooled significantly since the sun set a few hours ago. The breeze caresses her bare shoulders and, before she can even shiver, I shrug off my jacket and drape it over her. She looks up at me in a way that makes my stomach somersault, like I could have her, like should could be all mine. I can’t help but stare back, mesmerized by her, feeling the same pang I did the night of that kegger all those years ago.
“You look the way you looked the night I first saw you.”
Her brows furrow in confusion. “You mean thatmorningin the courtyard?”
“I—” I sigh and I know I need to tell her. I know that this truth is the only thing standing in the way of what I really want. I want her to know. She deserves to know exactly how I know Lily.
“I saw you at that party. I saw you with Lily and?—”
“You saw me and Lily?” she cuts me off, her body going rigid against my touch.
“Yeah. I mean mostly, I saw you. You were on a mission. You looked so determined, like you knew exactly how you would get everyone in this school to fall for you. You were breath taking, Liv. You still are.” I huff a nervous laugh, my face burning. I’m scared if I meet her eyes she’ll push me away.
“Yeah well, that’s ‘best-friend confidence’ for you,” she says, smiling sadly now.
“Best-friend confidence?” I feel my face scrunch up. There’s something about the way she talks about Lily, the way she seems to always put herself down in the process, and I want to wash that away.
“Yeah, like… everyone has someone who’s like their touchstone. And if they don't, that's a tragedy.” Tears brim at the corners of her eyes and I reach my hand out to swipe them away. “Lily was like… a siren, minus all the negative stuff. She just lured you in, lured me in, but kept you there with all her goodness. Like, obviously, Lily was gorgeous. Perfectly petite, hair out of a freakin fairytale.” She’s smiling now, but it’s just a different version of that same sad smile, the one I’ve seen her wear when Will belittles her, the one that saysI’m not enough. “She was the ideal everything. And when I was with her I was so close to that. She bolstered me. Every horrible thought I had, every awkward moment, every disgustingly mismatched outfit, she had an antidote.”
I can’t help but lift my eyebrows because the way she perceived Lily and the way she continues to perceive herself don’t line up at all with the Olivia I know.
“What?” she says, her breath hitching, my sleeve brushing her bare skin as I duck my body over hers, shielding her from the gala guests around us.
“It’s nothing, I just...”
Our eyes meet and a blush creeps up my cheeks. I stand there rubbing my lips together trying to figure out how I can tell her Ilove her without telling her I love her. How can I kiss her in front of all these people knowing she’s still somewhat with Will.
“You describe Lily the way I see you,” I say, pausing. I rub my hand over my face willing myself to say the words I’ve been thinking since I met her, to put caution to the wind and just say what everyone should have told her all along.
I take her hands, peering back down into her eyes. “You're magnificent, Olivia. Breathtaking. Every time I see you… every day I get tospeakto you, is my best day. You don’tneeda touchstone, youarethe touchstone. You are the ideal, the antidote, the siren— all the goodness in the world that you’re so quick to see in others.Youare Olivia. Not Lily. Not anyone else. Just you.”
