I stand and the world fuzzes around me. After gulping down four tequila shots I’m more drunk than I originally intended, and my four-inch stilettos seem like maybe not the best choice. The bartender eyes me and hands me a glass of water, my flirtatious smile lighting him up as he watches me chug the contents of the cup. Thankfully the water steadies me, but I know those shots are going to get me in trouble tonight.
As I move away from the bar I hear someone behind me rather loudly say, “Well look at this intergalactic princess.” I turn and am met with a blue buzzed head and a blindingly handsome smile. Ian.
“Thank god!” I yelp and pull him into a hug.
He pulls back immediately suspicious. “My, my, Olivia. You’re drunk.”
“Not drunk… a little drunk.” I swat his arm.
“I’m assuming you saw Will and the gnat that’s been following him around all evening.” With his arm around me he guides me into the ballroom. Grand chandeliers glitter across the vast ceiling, an ornate balcony houses a second bar thatlooks down on the checkerboard dance floor, and on the grand staircase a harpist plays a melody that can’t be heard over the DJ. What a waste.
“I wasn’t the only one who saw. Gen was… upset to say the least.”
Ian smiled at this. “Oh yeah, we saw old raccoon eyes when we arrived.”
That foreign feeling of guilt toward Gen pangs inside my stomach.
“So, my little protege, what will you do with this knowledge?” I swallow, the question sobering me up slightly. It was times like this I yearned for Lily or just female companionship in general. Ian was great but everything with him was plotting or scheming. He had a zero tolerance policy when it came to conversations about feelings.
“Well— we are on a break?—”
“Excuse me? When were you going to tell me this?” he asks, eyebrows raised.
“When I was ready for the entire world to know, meaning when I knew the ‘break’ wouldn’t be a temporary thing.” I give him a pointed stare.
“Right, yeah, running a gossip paper tends to make one a bit of a ‘blabber mouth.’” He rolls his eyes. “I’m assuming then, since you’re now telling me, that you’ve made that decision.”
“No comment,” I say drunkenly, batting my lashes at him as he playfully shoves me.
Ian kisses my cheek as he says his goodbyes, saying he has a lead on a story he has to run down. I watch him trot up the stairs past the harpist and just as my gaze shifts, I feelhimwatching me.
My entire body heats as my eyes move up his torso, his perfectly tailored suit making my drunkenness hit me like a wave as my stomach does a complete one eighty.Ben wouldhave that effect on any girl who's four shots deep, I tell myself. I pivot my eyes to the dance floor and pretend I’m looking for someone, trying to get a handle on my face burning with heat. I swallow as my gaze shifts back to him, a shy smile plastered across his handsome face. Either he caught me looking or he’s genuinely happy to see me. My breath catches and comes out in a rough gasp. Realizing more than likely too late that I’m utterly giving my attraction away, I begin moving toward him.
I round the final stair on the grand staircase and take him in. His hair is mussed the way it was when we studied, like he just dried it with a towel out of the bath. His suit is expertly tailored, highlighting his broad frame in a way that makes it apparent he commands not only the basketball team but any space he walks into. I suck in a breath, mustering up my confidence.
“Well, don’t you look nice,” I say, making a point to run my eyes down his body.
He smiles, a blush blooming across his face. “You look nice too, Olivia.” He looks down at his shoes, trying to avoid my gaze.
I sigh, annoyed he’s not giving me the reaction I’m craving. “Let’s try this again, Ben,” I say with false, booze filled bravado. “Well, don’t you look handsome.”
He lifts his eyes, meeting mine, his so dark I feel like they're sucking me into them. I have no choice but to lower my own and am met again with his immaculate body, my tequila infused brain having no problem allowing my eyes to make their way down it a second time. I catch the corner of his mouth twitching, attempting to reign in his smile as he observes me.
He ducks his head, his minty breath against my ear sending an involuntary shiver down my back.
“I like your dress.”
I feel the red creeping up my chest, his hand lightly grazing my hip. All of the lights seem to twinkle a little brighter, the music a little more finely tuned. I glance around, trying tobring myself back to reality. While I am not planning for this break to be a temporary thing with Will, I’m also not looking to completely embarrass him. Besides, Ben isn’t flirting with me, is he? I’m drunk and he’s just being polite.But that feeling of his hand grazing my hip.I shake my head, trying to snap myself out of this trance.
The harpist I saw earlier begins playing a soft melody that I instantly recognize. It takes me back to my etiquette school days, the balls Lily and I attended, and the boys who seemed to flock to her as I navigated my awkward middle school body.
“Livy, you have to dance with us,” Lily shouts as Colin Hemmes, the most sought after boy in the grade above us begins pulling Lily toward the dance floor. “I hear Jeffrey really likes you— ask him! You two would be so cute together!” she yelps as she finally lets Colin pull her in for a slow dance. My eyes drift to Jeffrey, a shy boy with pretty terrible acne who hasn’t quite grown out of his baby fat. I would look cute with him? He’s at least two feet shorter than me. I look down at my gangly long legs and my feet that seem clownish compared to the petite feet of my friends.
My heart sinks as I watch Colin’s golden blonde hair fall into his eyes as he looks longingly at my best friend, her silken hair almost glowing in the lights around her. My vision blurs at the realization that they look cute together, perfect even.
I begin to feel hot with embarrassment at the memory and feel exposed underneath Ben’s handsome gaze. I subconsciously wrap my arms around myself now embarrassed that I so openly flirted with Ben. I just sort of blew up my life and not necessarilyforBen but still, this nagging feeling inside me knows that he was definitely a factor. I never considered the possibility that he could reject me, but those old insecurities that Lily would bring out still plague me. When they come up mid conversation, it’shard to shake the feeling that I’m still that awkward teenager with the beautiful best friend.
“Hey… you okay?” Ben asks, pulling back to look down at me, concern flashing across his gaze as he notices my body language has changed. I clear my voice, trying to shake the drunken memory I somehow landed in.
