“They exist.”
Jay stares at me. A beat passes. Two. “I’m really glad you’re back.”
My heart warms for half a second. He’s probably only saying that to be polite. Definitely not in an I’m-glad-you’re-back-let’s-pick-up-where-we-left-off sort of way.
Right?
“I am, too,” I say.
“Are you trying out for the Wavettes this year?”
“Yeah.” I fiddle with the strap of my shoulder bag. “I actually wanted to talk to Raegan and Whitney about tryouts, but I haven’t seen them yet.”
Jay’s amused grin dissolves as if he’s swallowed something bitter. That’s when it hits me. There will be no picking up where we left off with Jay. Not when he’s dating Whitney, whose name suddenly tastes like charcoal.
I cringe at my own thoughts.She’s one of your best friends.
“Right.” Jay distinctly appears uncomfortable. He won’t make eye contact with me. “I’m sure they’ll help you with the new dances and… whatever.”
I’m losing him. Whatever connection we had minutes ago is gone. I have to say something to fix it.
“Definitely missed all those high kicks.”
Jay’s eyes move to my legs, then he flushes. OH GOD. I can only imagine the mental image I’ve just provided him. I need a subject change.
“And those—uh—BIG comfy Wavette sweatshirts,” I blurt.
Jay gives me a confused stare.
“AND SWEATPANTS.”
That should do it.
“Uh, you miss… the sweatpants?”
I give a very enthusiastic nod.
“I remember you were wearing those when I came over that one Christmas,” he says. “When it snowed, remember?”
I nod, surprised he actually remembers. We had a very rare white Christmas, and Jay came over to give me a present. I was a little disappointed at the thoughtlessness of the iTunes gift card, but I tried not to let it show. We ended up sitting on the porch swing drinking hot cocoa and watching the short-lived snowfall that had graced the town. It all felt very magical.
“It seems like forever ago,” I say without really thinking.
“Yeah,” Jay agrees.
We make eye contact. I want to tell him I miss him, but I think of Whitney. Lin is right. I can’t expect things to be the way that they were. Especially since I neglected my friends for so long. And Jay. Obviously he moved on. I mean, he’s one of the most attractive guys in Cedarville. It doesn’t hurt he’s grown a few inches, too.
I want to tell him that I hope we can be friends. Before I can get the words out, the secretary calls, “Kira Seneca?”
I turn to Jay and give a light shrug of my shoulders. “That’s me.”
“The one and only.” He smiles. Ugh. Why can’t his smile be less attractive? That would help. “See you at lunch?”
My mood instantly soars. Lunch! That’s one shred of normalcy I can grasp on to. It’s comforting that he still wants me to sit at our usual table. Maybe some things haven’t changed that much.
“Okay,” I say, then smile. “See you.”
SIX
