“Enoch?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“What’s going o-on? I don’t…where…”
“We’re still at my place. You fell asleep after dinner.”
“Your house…” An image of a large two-story home filled my mind, and it all came back to me. Reality sinking in like a lead anchor. I took another breath, my body completely wilting against his own.
I’m okay. I’m safe. I’m. Safe.
Enoch. Anchorage.
I finally managed to take a full breath.
He’s not here.
The adrenaline was crashing, my teeth were chattering, and I tried to get my muscles to relax and stop trembling.
“You must’ve just woken up from a bad dream or something. But we’re okay. We’ll get your eyes open soon enough. You don’t need to use the tub; you can use the shower to get cleaned up.”
The blood. That wasn’t a dream. If I had the energy I would have laughed. It was all in my head. I had fucking created the whole charade in my head. All because I started my period.
“My period.”
“Yeah,” he said softly. I felt the bed sink below his weight, and I was in his lap still. I cringed as I realized we were probably both covered in blood now.
He pressed a towel to my eyes, and I reached up to hold it in place, my hand brushing his.
This is so embarrassing. You’re such an idiot, Shiloh.
I mentally cringed at the memory of myself praying on my knees mere minutes ago.
Enoch’s hands were steady and comforting as he held me against his chest, one hand on my thigh the other rubbing my back.
My nose was running, and I used the damp towel to wipe at it. I was a disaster.
The cramps were back with full force now that I had headspace to actually take stock of my body.Hell. I don’t even know if I have any products in my bag.
I groaned, letting my head slump onto his shoulder.
“I was g-g-going really strong with my no cry-crying record. Three years. You al-always seem to be the-re when I break my streak.”
Enoch huffed a soft laugh and buried his face in my hair, squeezing me tighter.
“Maybe your body just knows you’re safe with me and sees a chance to release all the emotions you’ve been bottling up for years.”
I sighed, wishing I could see his face, see what he was thinking right now. I was sure it wasn’t anything good. And I knew he’d have a million questions as to why the hell I was on the ground praying.What was I even saying…Rebuking the devil?
Space.
I need some space. And to get the hell out of here.
I let another few minutes pass as I waited for the chattering to cease and my limbs to stop involuntarily spasming at random. I was hoping he’d be the one to break the silence, but I guessed he was too busy lost in his own head.
“I know this is probably really inconvenient, but could you grab my bag and look to see if I’ve got a pad or anything in there? Just check the front outside pocket, not inside the actual bag.”
There was an awkward pause, and I realized I sounded ridiculous trying to make sure he didn’t snoop, didn’t find my secret.
