“Yeah, of course.” Enoch shifted me onto the mattress, and I made a mental note to buy him a replacement pair of sheets.I hope he has a mattress protector on, because I definitely cannot afford a brand new one of those.
I removed the ice from my eyes and winced as the air kissed my cold and raw skin. My eyes were still swollen, but my left one I could open about a centimeter to see…nothing. A yellow blur I assumed was his bedroom.Great.
I felt absolutely disgusting. Bike shorts that were soaked with blood, drying sheen of sweat all over my body, swollen and burning eyes, and aching limbs. And cramps. Damn, I hated cramps.
I just wanted to shower and clean up the mess I’d made and then I’d drive myself home. But my damn eyes weren’t anywhere near ready to allow me to do any of that.
Maybe if I went back to sleep this would all be a nightmare I’d wake up from in the morning.
I heard Enoch in the hall and then he was in the room.
“So, I found a couple of liners and a tampon. It’s yellow, I dunno what that means size wise, but if it’s not gonna be enough to get you to the morning, I can run to the Holiday and grab something or run to your place.”
“What time is it?”
“Just after three.”
I nodded. “Um. I think maybe I should just head home after I get everything cleaned up. Once I can see. Hopefully not much longer.”
“You’re funny,” he deadpanned. “I’ll clean the bed and the floor, while—”
“The floor? Sheesh, I—”Say it dammit. Say the damn word.I clenched my jaw, internally screaming at myself at the riot of fear that had my stomach tensing.“I’m…Forgive me for the inconvenience and the mess.”
You’re so fucking weak.
“Seriously, don’t worry about it. I need to rip out this orange carpet anyways.”
I groaned.He’ll have to rip out the carpet?
“Really, Shy. You just get yourself feeling better. I’ll get the shower on for you, and you can relax in there until your eyes are better alright?”
When I didn’t say anything he continued. “And I’ll get you something to wear.”
I wanted to refuse but I was honestly a little afraid that if I saw all that blood in the mattress, it’d send me into another downward spiral of bad memories and even worse panic.
“Okay.”
“Okay,” he sighed. I guessed he was expecting me to put up more of a fight. He picked me up bridal style and then the sound of the shower running surrounded me.He placed me directly into the shower, the warm spray immediately hitting my neck.
“Just leave your wet clothes in the shower. And shout if you need me. Hold on.”
Moments later he returned. “Your bag, clean clothes, I know the boxers probably won’t really fit, but maybe roll them? Um, and a towel. They’re here on the counter whenever you’re done. But take your time.”
I couldn’t help but remember how the last time he had put me into a shower I had woken from a nightmare and had a panic attack.
Was I ever going to be normal?
July 12, Sunday
Enoch
I covered the spot on the floor with a cleaning rag and strained my ears to hear anything from the bathroom. Nothing but the shower running. I was antsy, despite how tired I felt, and looked around the room for something to keep me occupied. I ended uppacing the length of my bedroom, unable to sit still with my mind somewhere else. Stuck on the way Shiloh had been on her knees, hysterical and praying.
I never remembered her being particularly religious, and I couldn’t wrap my head around why the hell she was praying so earnestly, rebuking Satan. What the hell did Satan have to do with her period? And what the fuck did the bathtub have to do with any of that?
The whole thing left me feeling sick and anxious. It was wrong. Whatever it was, whatever had made her act that way, it was wrong. I knew it in my bones. Something had happened to her,someonehad made her afraid, terrified, and it gnawed at me. The sound of her sobbing, like she was afraid for her life…it gave me chills just thinking about it.
And I didn’t know what the fuck I should do. Ask her about it? That might upset her again, send her into another panic attack. Ignore it? That would mean ignoring the awful feeling in my gut that told me this was something sinister. And I didn’t want to do that. Not again.
