The problem with being someone who liked to be in charge was that frequently other people didn’t play by my rules. Angel had insisted on taking the damned bus again, and it didn’t matter that he’d never been to my house. He wouldn’t let me drive him here. We’d been bordering on an argument this afternoon as we parted ways in front of the office building, and I was on the verge of yelling when it had finally occurred to me that this might be a limit for him. I’d caved and let him have his independence.
I wasn’t a fan.
My boy shouldn’t have to ride the fucking bus. I tried not to worry about Angel because in spite of any roles we might decide to play with each other, he was a grown man. It was difficult to ignore the minutes winding down to our agreed upon date time of seven o’clock, though. Outside, darkness had fallen and snow swirled past the windows.
I used the time waiting for him to arrive to get everything ready. I set my Roombas loose. There was a robot vacuum for both floors of the house, and I spotted the downstairs one scooting around near the front door as I passed through the living room on the way to the kitchen, where I considered pouring myself a drink to steady my nerves.
The last thing I wanted was for Angel to think I was a drunk after what I’d seen of his father, so I didn’t. I’d had him at a bar last night, too, and found myself unwilling to give him a bad impression.
Normally I didn’t give a fuck what someone thought about my actions—any of them. I was sweating this.
The wooden countertops gleamed because the cleaning company had been in today. The stone flooring shone with a glossy perfection and the burnished copper sinks were spotless. The matching fridge didn’t have a smudge on it and neither did the stove. I tried to see the room the way Angel would, but I had no clue what he would find fault with in a home.
Considering his apartment, maybe this place would overwhelm him. I groaned.
It would be easy to work myself into a lather over the house, or I could focus on the prep for tonight. I trekked through the living room to a half door that opened into my den, which was much cozier than any other room. There was a small silver wood-burning stove in the corner. Natural heat radiated from the rounded steel and would keep the floor warm. I’d arranged a bright blue beanbag chair next to the low wooden coffee table in front of the long couch that took up the wall on the right of the door. Opposite the seating, the widescreen TV waited, cued up to the start of the movie I’d said I would watch.The Nightmare Before Christmasseemed kind of dark, but I wanted to know what he enjoyed so much about it.
I had serious plans for tonight.
First would be Angel’s teeny bopper fun time. He could sketch and we’d watch his movie with pizza and pop. If he was still hungry, I’d make him popcorn later. Then, we could go out back and hit the hot tub, and he could transition into adult time.
If I was extra lucky, we might fuck. That particular activity was more a wish list item than a plan, but a man had to have aspirations. In reality, it would likely be best to take my time with him.
Hopefully the evening would unfold the way I envisioned it, but even if it didn’t, I wanted to see how Angel behaved as a middle. If things didn’t go well, I liked him enough I wouldn’t be too disappointed. I hoped that if I kept telling myself that, it would be true. He was handsome and sweet, and maybe this urge to be someone’s Daddy was something I’d have to tuck away and forget about.
But, I didn’t want to abandon the kinky part of myself. I breathed away more jitters.
On the coffee table I had laid out a sketchbook and two tins of pencils, which had cost a lot more than I’d thought they would, but the girl at the art supplies shop at the mall said they were what any artist would want. She’d sold me so hard on them, given the perfect sales pitch, that I would have felt badnotbuying them. I had more art supplies tucked in the closet in case those weren’t exactly what he wanted. The sales girl had unearthed an adult coloring book of dragons, and I’d grabbed that too. I paced around the table and glared at the gifts. I didn’t think I’d ever been this neurotic about someone coming to the house. The last boyfriend I’d had didn’t last long, but he’d liked remote control cars. I’d considered buying some of those sorts of toys. In the end, I was glad Angel was different.
I’d never met anyone like him.
Blowing out a long breath, I checked my outfit. He hadn’t seen me out of work clothes yet, and I wore an athletic shirt and black sweats. I tugged at the blue shirt. I liked to lounge around in this stuff, but I didn’t know if he’d like it. What if he was into suits? What if I was ruining something for him by looking this way? I glanced up when I thought I heard someone at the front door, but the Roomba cruised by in the other room and I growled at it. What was I forgetting?
“Oh!” I jogged out of the den and upstairs to my room to check the other supplies I’d bought. Lube, condoms. Those were tucked away under one of my pillows, but I didn’t care if we got to those tonight. I grinned at the large Lego Spider-Man stuffie I’d found at the toy store. I wasn’t sure he’d like the toy as much as the pillow he already had, but this soft Spider-Man was half Angel’s size and I hoped he would think it was fun. I went to the connected bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror.
A big mean guy glared back. It didn’t help that I knew I was freaking the fuck out. The knowledge didn’t make me stop. Until he got here in one piece, I wouldn’t be okay. I went out and snagged a black hoodie from my closet that I liked to wear when I ran outdoors, and then carried it downstairs with me so he’d have it if he needed it. His cast would fit through the sleeve and I didn’t care if he had to stretch the cuff out.
He’d sat in the office today huddled in my suit jacket while he pecked away at his tablet, and that wouldn’t be happening again.
The doorbell rang just as I was considering getting in my car to go find him, but when I checked my phone it was still two minutes to seven, so he was early. I laughed and rushed through the living room to open the door.
Angel stood on the front porch, and as usual, he was beautiful. The blue tips in his hair gleamed and blacker than sin eyeliner made his golden brown eyes pop and sparkle. He had a small freckle on his left cheek that I’d noticed, however it was darker, and I swore it was glittery. Had he dotted his eyeliner on it? He gave me a skittish smile that flashed into life and disappeared almost as fast.
My mouth went dry. Fuck, it might be more difficult to let him have his movie time than I’d thought. I wanted to take him upstairs and strip him bare. I opened the door wider and excitement worked its way through me. Anticipation was half the fun. “Come in. Let me take your things.”
He nodded, and we did an awkward dance as he scooted past me inside because I tried to take his messenger bag from his shoulder, and he swerved away from me before he stopped still and allowed me to remove it. I stripped my suit jacket from him. He’d taken it home earlier, and I’d been happy to let him. He turned and closed the door, cutting off the cold air from outside.
“Sorry,” he murmured. His voice had the same effect as a gong in the large living room, reverberating a bit, and it hit me how infrequently I had anyone here.
“Stop that. You don’t need to apologize all the time.”
“Yeah, I do,” he grumped, with more attitude than I’d seen from him so far. I was surprised, but I took his bag and the suit jacket over and hung them in the closet near the door.
When I turned back he was cradling his cast to his chest and it was my turn to be irked. “Did you ever take anything for your arm?”
He quirked his eyebrows. “When the fuck was I supposed to do that?”
“You’re being rude right now,” I snapped and then wanted to groan. I shouldn’t have gone directly into caretaker mode with him, but it was too late now.
