Angel crossed his arms, which was a graceless dance where he ended up cradling his cast with his good hand as his cheeks blushed a pretty rose. “Should I go?”
“No, absolutely not.”
He hung his head and let loose a pained laugh. “I’m sorry. I’m already doing things wrong.”
I walked over and opened my arms to him. He eyed me up and it took him about a minute to inch himself close enough for me to wrap him tight in a hug. His slim body fit just right against my front, and I soothed my hand up and down his back while his tantalizing muskiness filled my nose—bodywash, deodorant, and man. He wasn’t complicated at a basic level, and I liked the simple masculine scent.
He broke our quiet moment by tilting his head back and resting his cheek on my chest. “I used my time on the bus to google a few things.”
“That sounds dangerous,” I said and then chuckled.
He didn’t laugh with me. Instead, that pretty mouth of his screwed up into an offended scowl. “Do you think I’m a baby or something? Is that why you wanted to have me over?”
Oh, shit. Of course he didn’t wait. Why would he?I hoped like hell he hadn’t gotten ten thousand wrong ideas. “Not at all. I’m aware you’re a man. An adult. It was very clear last night.”
At the mention of me getting him off, he cuddled closer, but that unhappy expression didn’t leave him. “I read some about littles because that came up on the search. I couldn’t find much about middles, except one mention on a blog about littles, and that was… a lot. The pretending to be toddlers and kids thing. And not me.”
He tilted his head back farther and blinked his wide eyes too fast, almost like he was trying to read my mind. His penetrating gaze was all the more intense with the outline of shimmery black. I hated that there seemed to be a wall between us that hadn’t been there this afternoon. I wanted to rip his hesitation apart with my bare hands even though this was something that needed words. My strength couldn’t fix this.
“What I would like is to take care of you. Give you space to let out your inner child, I guess. I’m not into young age play. Middles are like… you get to be in the headspace of how you were when you were eleven or twelve. Some people even go up to seventeen with it. You don’t have to worry about all the adult garbage. You get to be free. To me, to see a middle at play is how someone who truly had no worries would act all the time. It’s… pure.” I cleared my throat and hoped I hadn’t gotten too philosophical about what was still, at its core, a big kink of mine. Middles still needed someone to take care of them, and I wanted to be that man for Angel.
“Adultsarethe worst,” he grumbled, and I had to laugh even though he was too serious. “So… I’d get to pretend to do things I liked to do when I was younger?”
“No, you’d get to actually do the things you love to do without worrying about judgement. You can pretend you’re a certain age or just… go with the flow. It’s something you have to find your comfort zone in, but I like it. I want to see you happy.”
Angel dropped his forehead against my chest, and I loved the way he snuggled close.
“You’re such a cutie.”
Maybe that was the right thing to say because he straightened up again and the worry lines were missing from around his mouth and eyes. He smiled and his cheeks were bright with a blush again, though I didn’t think he was embarrassed.
“Uh… I still like all the same stuff. I never got to do the things I loved much, then. I’m not any different in a lot of ways. Well… a couple….” He bit the corner of his lip and the hot look he sent me left no room for confusion about what he thought was more grown-up about him now, especially when he rocked his hips forward lightly.
“I gathered all that when I met you.” He held still as I danced my fingertips along the curve of his cheek down to his chin. “Your hair and fun shirt made me wonder. Then I saw your apartment. That’s part of the reason I hoped this might work. I’d be willing to try with you anyway, even if you don’t think you can do this. Don’t stress.”
“I’m not going to suck binkies or anything. That’s baby stuff.” He glowered at me, and it took me a second to realize his tone had changed slightly. Was more bratty, but not by much. Was he starting already? My heart leaped.
“Good because I have something else I’d love to have you suck on sometime.”
Angel’s mouth fell open and then he popped his hand over his lips and his shoulders shook in laughter. “So… I get to just… be myself. Only without worrying about being acceptable?” Confusion colored his words, and I rubbed my hand along his slim back.
“You still need to be a good boy or there will be consequences. A responsible adult provides those. Now, does your wrist hurt?”
His obstinate pout said it all, and when it looked like he might be gearing up to say no, I slipped my hand down his back and then gave his left asscheek a tiny squeeze.
He gulped and said, “Yes.”
“Come on.” I guided him into the den and sat him on the couch before I ran to the kitchen to get him ibuprofen. When I came back, his shoes were off next to the side of the coffee table and his socked foot was tapping. He had his gaze fixed firmly on the sketchbooks on the table and reminded me of nothing more than a starved dog eyeing food. I was happy I’d bought the gifts and furious that he didn’t already have everything he wanted. I’d have to be careful or he’d be spoiled… but I didn’t care too much.
“See something you want?”
He gave me big eyes. Now that I’d had some experience with him, I knew that the meds probably had to come first or it would be a fight.
“Open,” I said and held the pills toward him.
His bottom lip jutted, and though I didn’t want to start our playtime with something he wouldn’t like, I’d do it if he fought me on this.
“I won’t ask twice,” I said.
